Columbia Can't Stop Pablo Escobar's Hippos

Sunday, February 10, 2019

Escobar started with four hippos during his reign of terror. Now they number in the dozens and Columbia doesn't know how to stop them. The giants, native only to Africa, are now running wild in Colombia, reports CBS News' Manuel Bojorquez. There's concern the hippos have already started to displace native wildlife, like the manatee, and keep getting too close for comfort.

Posted by AMERICANUNITY at 08:32 AM | 20 COMMENTS | permalink | Comment on This Entry |

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(Hippo fart)

#1 | Posted by AMERICANUNITY at 2019-02-10 02:18 AM | Reply

www.youtube.com

#2 | Posted by AMERICANUNITY at 2019-02-10 02:18 AM | Reply

"We can't just kill the hippos

Why not?

If they were really such a danger, the problem could be dealt with rather quickly.

#3 | Posted by jpw at 2019-02-10 03:36 AM | Reply | Newsworthy 1

They need water and are too big to hide. They also happen to be the most dangerous mammal to humans in Africa. Columbia should shoot them all while they still can.

#4 | Posted by bayviking at 2019-02-10 08:47 AM | Reply

Only a matter of time before they spread and move north like the african killer bees.

#5 | Posted by visitor_ at 2019-02-10 09:15 AM | Reply | Funny: 1

I'm pretty sure they can end this by having a trophy hunt.

#6 | Posted by BruceBanner at 2019-02-10 11:20 AM | Reply

This is why America is better than most other countries. We cab solve problems.

Grump and the GOP are ruining that.

#7 | Posted by BruceBanner at 2019-02-10 11:20 AM | Reply

Sounds like an episode of The Simpsons.

#8 | Posted by moder8 at 2019-02-10 12:39 PM | Reply

I'm pretty sure they can end this by having a trophy hunt.

don jr. could use eric for bait.

#9 | Posted by REDIAL at 2019-02-10 12:58 PM | Reply | Funny: 1

Why kill them? Send them back to Africa.

Don't take that quote out of context on me, righties.

#10 | Posted by IndianaJones at 2019-02-10 01:05 PM | Reply

Nevermind, I just assumed they were endangered in Africa. They're not... yet. They should definitely kill them or sterilize them somehow; If they're a bad enough pest they can destroy the ecology for a long, long time.

#11 | Posted by IndianaJones at 2019-02-10 01:07 PM | Reply

Kill them all.

#12 | Posted by BruceBanner at 2019-02-10 10:39 PM | Reply

Sell big game trophy hunt licenses.

#13 | Posted by snoofy at 2019-02-11 01:17 AM | Reply

Give them cocaine.

#14 | Posted by ClownShack at 2019-02-11 03:04 AM | Reply | Newsworthy 1

In America they'd already be dead. You don't need special permits for invasive species.

#15 | Posted by sitzkrieg at 2019-02-11 07:54 AM | Reply

Shoot the hippos. They are non-native invasive species, and have no business in Colombia. Also, you can send the meat to that Socialist paradise Venezuela, where they are in desperate need of other people's help. Like usual.

#16 | Posted by Spork at 2019-02-11 08:58 AM | Reply

I don't think you can bring them back home because they may have special south American parasites and diseases

#17 | Posted by BruceBanner at 2019-02-11 03:27 PM | Reply | Newsworthy 1

"I don't think you can bring them back home because they may have special south American parasites and diseases"

All morality arguments or political pot-shots aside, this is the most important consideration.

#18 | Posted by Hagbard_Celine at 2019-02-11 03:44 PM | Reply

Disguise explosives as white marbles.
Let the hilarity ensue.

#19 | Posted by 101Chairborne at 2019-02-11 04:10 PM | Reply | Funny: 1

Give them cocaine.

#14 | POSTED BY CLOWNSHACK AT 2019-02-11 03:04 AM | REPLY

With those nostrils? You'd need a rolled 8'x10' area rug, a wall mirror on the floor, a samurai sword, and about 200 kilos.

#20 | Posted by 101Chairborne at 2019-02-11 04:13 PM | Reply