Drudge Retort: The Other Side of the News
Friday, January 26, 2018

Scientists in the Swiss city of Basel have solved a decades-old mystery over the identity of a mummified woman. Their research revealed a surprise: the woman is the great-great-great-great-great-great-great grandmother of UK Foreign Secretary Boris Johnson. The body was uncovered in 1975 while renovations were being done on Basel's Barfusser Church. She was buried right in front of the altar, clearly well fed, and wearing good quality clothes. This was obviously the body of a wealthy lady of Basel. But who was she exactly, and when did she die?

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Kinda looks like him too.

#1 | Posted by SheepleSchism at 2018-01-25 01:36 PM | Reply | Funny: 3

Wow who knew syphilis was hereditary?!?

#2 | Posted by truthhurts at 2018-01-25 03:10 PM | Reply

Somewhere there's a kid who told Boris on the playground, "Oh, yeah, your grandma had syphilis!," and he's feeling pretty good right now.

#3 | Posted by rcade at 2018-01-26 08:29 PM | Reply

Boris or his Johnson?

#4 | Posted by snoofy at 2018-01-26 08:37 PM | Reply

historians to suspect the mummy was a member of a well-established Basel family, the Bischoffs.

And there are descendants of this family who, to this day, work in the public sphere.

Illuminati confirmed

#5 | Posted by GOnoles92 at 2018-01-27 10:32 AM | Reply

Nice

#6 | Posted by hamburglar at 2018-01-27 01:17 PM | Reply

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