Wednesday, January 24, 2018
We're about to watch the crowd that tried to impeach Bill Clinton over a blowjob suddenly decry puritanism if it turns out Trump is having an affair.
If evangelicals were capable of shame, they would have watched in horror last week as the civilized world learned that their Orange Messiah was accused of having an affair with porn star Stormy Daniels while his third wife Melania tended to their newborn son. (In fairness to the Religious Right, these allegations are significantly less awful than Roy Moore's Child Rape Revival that they endorsed in droves, so ... praise Jesus?) There were also tawdry details about Trump allegedly telling Daniels that she looked just like Ivanka in case everyone forgot all of those times that the President of the United States said he'd bang his own daughter. (Once again, in fairness to superstitious looney bins, tons of incest in the Bible. Just loads of it.) ... But here's the truly fucked up part, America knew who Donald Trump was before the white, Bible-humping parts elected him president. Why would he change now? The crazy bastard actually believes he won the popular vote, and he tweets five times a day that he's the bestest president that ever presidented. Self-reflection isn't going to be an issue here. If his orange butthole mouth woofed down McDonald's and extramarital affairs before the election, then dammit, his orange butthole mouth is going to keep doing it after the election because that's his reward. He's the president, and you're not.
And to really make your goddamn head explode, we're about to watch the crowd that tried to impeach Bill Clinton over a blowjob decry puritanism out of one side of their mouths while simultaneously letting health workers refuse treatment to LBGT patients because we're not allowed to burn witches in a modern society. For now.
"But what the president does in the Lincoln Bedroom next to a bucket of KFC is his business. Who are we to judge?" is what you're about to hear from someone trying to make it legal to fire a bazooka into a Planned Parenthood.
God bless America.
Admin's note: Participants in this discussion must follow the site's moderation policy. Profanity will be filtered. Abusive conduct is not allowed.