Drudge Retort: The Other Side of the News
Sunday, June 18, 2017

Happy Father's Day to all the Drudge Retort members who are celebrating today having a father or being one. CNN correspondent David M. Drucker offers an essay remembering his. "Over the next two decades, as divorce and split families grew in acceptance and frequency, my sister and I were raised in an intact house full of love," he writes. "Our father told us that he loved us every single day, flooding us with the kind of attention I suspect he wanted but didn't receive from his own parents. Of course, what sounded like love to him could sound like a broken record of virulent criticism to me: You're not working hard enough. You're not trying hard enough. You're not studying hard enough. What the hell's wrong with you?"

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After the death of my dad Roger Cadenhead in February, this is my first Father's Day as a member of the "we can't call him" club. He and I had some long talks on the phone on this day over the years, which were just as likely to be about the Kennedy Assassination, the origins of World War II or Texas Rangers starting pitching as about family and everyday goings-on.

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No thanks. He's dead and was an ------- anyway. But I will call my son.

#1 | Posted by TFDNihilist at 2017-06-18 12:47 PM | Reply

Thanks RCADE.
Already have as well as all my siblings and friends. Lost my Mom last rear and Mothers day will never be the same.

#2 | Posted by Federalist at 2017-06-18 12:52 PM | Reply

My daughter called her father and told me she had accepted her first job after getting her PhD, with an ecological lab in Jupiter.

Best Father's Day news ever!

#3 | Posted by Corky at 2017-06-18 01:04 PM | Reply | Newsworthy 4

We Can't call him club member #279.

Dad, is it really hot there or is there milk and honey?

My dad had many bad qualities, when viewed from the current perspective, but he was a person of his time. He also had some good qualities.

He was a racist and a tough 'in-your-face' and 'kick-your-ass' kind of person. He didn't even finish elementary school, it being seen as a waste of time, when there as work to be done. He was at the end of the old south and had a hard time with the new ideas. Other than that, he was a real pistol. He worked harder than anyone i ever saw, he never stopped, never yielded and never gave up.

Of all of his 7 children, I was his favorite son. I would have been wearing my sphincter for a hat if i had even considered dropping out of school or not conducting myself with class and aplomb in public.

He was almost killed in an accident and was disabled for the rest of his life. Up till then, his work (in the army as a tank driver and later as a heavy equipment operator) gave his life meaning, and made a fair living too, but he nearly lost all that meaning for the rest of his life after the accident. He was poisoned by his own idea that a man who couldn't work, or go to school, or move forward, wasn't worth anything to anyone. He never got over his inability to read and comprehend the written word.

Finally, he snapped out of it and became a small time entrepreneur. We owned several restaurants and one truck stop and even a truck. I drove that truck the first time when i was 15. I scared the crap out of my dad and he decided maybe i should do something else. (I almost ran us in a canyon about 1000 ft deep.)

Just as he served as a good example in some things, he served also as an example of what not to be in other ways.

He told me once, 'son, we come from nowhere and we are nobodies, but that doesn't mean we have to prove it everyday by dressing like dirty bums, smelling like crap, having nasty hair and speaking like fools (which described many of the people in our circles). You have a chance, more than any other of my children to make it out of ---------. Please, do so.'

'Hey dad, I did do something, and i am successful. I couldn't have done it without your brutality and your unstoppable drive and your sense of humor.'

#4 | Posted by kudzu at 2017-06-18 01:21 PM | Reply

John Biggs of TechCrunch wrote a great tribute to his:

techcrunch.com

#5 | Posted by rcade at 2017-06-18 01:29 PM | Reply

"Consider the fact that for 3.8 billion years, a period of time older than the Earth's mountains and rivers and oceans, every one of your forebears on both sides has been attractive enough to find a mate, healthy enough to reproduce, and sufficiently blessed by fate and circumstances to live long enough to do so. Not one of your pertinent ancestors was squashed, devoured, drowned, starved, stranded, stuck fast, untimely wounded, or otherwise deflected from its life's quest of delivering a tiny charge of genetic material to the right partner at the right moment in order to perpetuate the only possible sequence of hereditary combinations that could result -- eventually, astoundingly, and all too briefly -- in you."
― Bill Bryson, A Short History of Nearly Everything

Thanks for doing your part Dad!

#6 | Posted by Whizzo at 2017-06-18 01:51 PM | Reply

I don't have a phone line to heaven.

#7 | Posted by 726 at 2017-06-18 02:54 PM | Reply

I'm taking my to Vegas at the airport now!!!!
< In Alan from the Hangover's voice > VEGAS BABY!!!!!!!

#8 | Posted by aborted_monson at 2017-06-18 03:04 PM | Reply

"VEGAS BABY!"

Don't miss the downtown area. Yuuuuge difference from 10 years ago. The bride and I stay at the Nugget, visit the Strip as needed, but prefer juking from one joint to another on Freemont.

#9 | Posted by Danforth at 2017-06-18 03:07 PM | Reply

My dad was an amazing person. Selfless to a fault. Been sitting here remembering all our canoe trips, hunting trips, all my sports games where I could hear him cheering while I was on the field. He wanted to be my dad when I was a little cotton top boy whose biological father flew the coop on.

Seriously, the best thing I can say about my dad is that I want to be like him.

#11 | Posted by lfthndthrds at 2017-06-18 03:57 PM | Reply

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When I was a boy of fourteen, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around. But when I got to be twenty-one, I was astonished at how much he had learned in seven years.
~Mark Twain

#12 | Posted by Danforth at 2017-06-18 04:02 PM | Reply

Appropriate acts are in general measured by the relations they are concerned with. "He is your father." This means that you are called upon to take care of him, give way to him in all things, bear with him if he reviles or strikes you.

"But he is a bad father."

Well, have you any natural claim to a good father? No, only to a father.

--Epictetus, Enchiridion 30

#13 | Posted by madscientist at 2017-06-18 05:24 PM | Reply

RCADE I am so sorry this is the first Father's Day you can't call your Dad. I am blessed that I can still call mine. Happy Father's Day to all Dads.

#14 | Posted by gracieamazed at 2017-06-18 06:22 PM | Reply

"RCADE I am so sorry this is the first Father's Day you can't call your Dad." - #14 | Posted by gracieamazed at 2017-06-18 06:22 PM

It has been 22 Fathers Days since I was able to call my daddy. And it still saddens me.

"I am blessed that I can still call mine."

Call him often and tell him you love him... every single time.

#15 | Posted by Hans at 2017-06-18 06:25 PM | Reply | Newsworthy 2

My dad was awesome. I try and be as good a dad as he was, mostly I fail but, every once in a while I nail it. When I was about 16 we tore down the old deck and built a new one. He wanted to add a sun room on it eventually so he engineered it to add one one day. He didn't get permits etc. just did it. When the inspector came out a few years later when we went to add the sun room he saw that we never got the permit and I could almost hear his eyes rolling imagining the slap dash job we did building and what would have to be done to add the sun room. After he finished the inspection his whole manner changed turns out we could have added a 2 story expansion to the house on the support my dad designed. His attention to detail is something I still carry with me today.

He was also very selfless, after a trip to Puerto Rico in the early 2000's to consult on a hotel he found out the local school didn't have any computers to teach the kids on. At the time I was selling computers so he called me. He bought and paid to ship 20 computers to the school. When my dad called and told me what he was trying to do it didn't even phase me since that was just the kind of guy he was.

He died of ALS a pretty nasty way to go, I miss our talks.

#16 | Posted by TaoWarrior at 2017-06-18 06:27 PM | Reply | Newsworthy 1

I did call him he is 86 years old and now can hardly hear, we came close to fighting again but I calmed down and we ended up having OK conversation

#17 | Posted by PunchyPossum at 2017-06-18 07:38 PM | Reply

Good job punchy.

Mine doesn't want to accept his age or that I can work harder than him without dying.

...yes seriously we're kinda insane like that.

#18 | Posted by Tor at 2017-06-18 08:17 PM | Reply

I only had vague memories of my dad, as my mom divorced him when I was 8. She then proceeded to marry a beast in my step Dad. My step dad was tough, once smacked me in the ear so hard it bled for looking at his ------. But he had a hard work ethic and was street smart. Problem with that is, he got hooked on drugs, especially crack and cocaine during the early 90's. He lost everything and died while I was serving in Belgium.

Now my biological dad waited all this out. Throughout all my mom bad mouthing him, I sensed something about what my mom was telling me wasn't right. When I graduated from high school, he showed up and we have been close ever sense. My mom kept me close to "her family" and hardly ever let me go to my father's side. Now we are closer than ever and I have met family members I didn't know existed.

I asked my father how he felt about what mama had done and he said "Son, sometimes you just let things go and God will work it out".

God certainly did in this instance.

#19 | Posted by boaz at 2017-06-19 07:48 AM | Reply | Newsworthy 2

That's one for the ages Boaz.

www.youtube.com

#20 | Posted by Tor at 2017-06-19 08:14 PM | Reply

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