Tuesday, December 26, 2017

A Tribute to My Improbable Tea Party Friend

Stephanie Mencimir: Our unlikely bond only grew stronger when we were both diagnosed with cancer this spring. On paper, Robin Stublen and I should never have been friends. He was a Donald Trump-supporting self-identified redneck who hated Hillary Clinton and Barack Obama, thought liberals were ruining the country, was deeply offended by NFL players taking a knee during the national anthem, and supported oil drilling off the coast of Florida, where he lived. I am a bleeding-heart liberal who fears what Donald Trump is doing to the country, thinks it's about time that political protests hit the NFL sidelines, and abhors oil drilling off the coast of Florida, even though I don't live there and never will. Improbably, though, we were friends, at least until this month: Robin died on December 19 at the age of 61.

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Had my exposure to Robin been limited to internet communications, surely we would have hated each other. As the returns came in showing Trump winning the presidential election, Robin wrote on his Facebook page, "Folks that sound you hear is the jet engines warming up to take all those liberal sons-of-bitches the hell out of this country!" But behind every random and divisive Facebook posting is a human being, and Robin was a complex and endearing one.

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After all these years of our odd-couple relationship, I'm still not really sure why Robin picked me as his friend, or why he chose to share his cancer journey with me the way he did. After Robin died, one of his friends posted on his Facebook page, "I know right now he is at the pearly gates arguing with St. Peter on how liberals should not be allowed in heaven." But he's wrong about that. Robin liked me, and I liked him. We were friends in a way that seems almost impossible in today's climate, and my life has been so much better because of it. I will really, really miss him.

#1 | Posted by Gal_Tuesday at 2017-12-26 10:52 AM

I don't understand articles like this. They imply that you have to agree with the very detailed politics of another person before you can form a meaningful relationship.

The ideas of 'community' and 'family' are the exact opposite of this idea. In a community or family, you have to take people as they are. Plus, wouldn't it be boring to only hang out with people who shadow your own thoughts?

I will give you an example; I will fight and argue with Boaz about politics and society until the cows come home, because we probably agree on very few details, but i like him and if he needs help or someone to talk to, I will do what i can to help him (and i believe he would do the same for me). This is community. This is family. This is respect for others, even though one thinks they are completely wrong.

#2 | Posted by kudzu at 2017-12-26 12:11 PM

I don't understand articles like this. They imply that you have to agree with the very detailed politics of another person before you can form a meaningful relationship.

The ideas of 'community' and 'family' are the exact opposite of this idea. In a community or family, you have to take people as they are.

#2 | POSTED BY KUDZU

Agree 100%

#3 | Posted by PinchALoaf at 2017-12-26 12:25 PM

They imply that you have to agree with the very detailed politics of another person before you can form a meaningful relationship.

Welcome to Liberal logic ....
Nearly half of liberals don't even like to be around Trump supporters
www.washingtonpost.com
Why Liberals Aren't as Tolerant as They Think
www.politico.com

The ideas of 'community' and 'family' are the exact opposite of this idea. In a community or family, you have to take people as they are. Plus, wouldn't it be boring to only hang out with people who shadow your own thoughts?

Clearly you don't understand community....

Your statement is a dichotomy, or antipodal, you can't have a community or family with people that don't shadow much of your own thoughts.

Its why Corky lives in Naples, plenty of people with same demographic, same background and belief systems....

I work at an very large international corporation, in fact on my floor and within my division there are no native born Americans. Guess what, as a company, we don't have a Christmas Party, we don't celebrate Thanksgiving, Halloween, or any of the federal holidays.

But when there is a Chinese celebration, all the Chinese workers take the days off, Indians the same ......

You see where I work there is no community, no sense of family, there is no sense of we are in this together. The Indians have lunch with the Indians, the Chinese have lunch with the Chinese, the Spaniards have lunch with the Spaniards, the Swedish have lunch with the Swedish, the Japanese have lunch with the Japanese.

This is the Progressive Ideal world, no religion, no country lines, diversity galore, bland as hell absolutely no character. Yet, racial lines and barriers still exist regardless of laws and regulations, why? Because people are still drawn genetically to sameness.

SiliconValley has changed tremendously in the last 20 years, look for it at your future job, complete blandness because by definition, diversity is antipodal to community.

#4 | Posted by AndreaMackris at 2017-12-26 12:31 PM

- Its why Corky lives in Naples, plenty of people with same demographic, same background and belief systems....

Obviously, I live more in your head. And Collier county is as Red as they come. Have you ever, ever gotten anything right?

- diversity is antipodal to community.

How Diversity Makes Us Smarter
Being around people who are different from us makes us more creative, more diligent and harder-working

www.scientificamerican.com

Cultural Diversity in the Work Place
How Diversity at Work Makes More Money for You

www.thebalance.com

Again I ask, have you ever been right about anything at all?

#5 | Posted by Corky at 2017-12-26 12:47 PM

wait, Gov Scott personally guaranteed his healthcare? ...

no mention of whether or not Robin, RIP, thought inter-racial marriage should be banned.
apparently, the author didn't ask the right questions -- which might have helped her so-called friend.

--btw, Naples is full of Nazis and wannabe Confederates, the rest are migrant workers and laughing billionaires.

#6 | Posted by ichiro at 2017-12-26 01:43 PM

"You see where I work there is no community, no sense of family, there is no sense of we are in this together."

There are plenty of mental institutions for folks just like you.

I am sure if you looked hard enough you can find one where you can fulfill that sense of "we are all in this (insane asylum) together".

#7 | Posted by donnerboy at 2017-12-26 03:53 PM

This is respect for others, even though one thinks they are completely wrong.

The problem comes in when the "other side" starts making policy decisions based on their ideological beliefs. I can listen to you talk all day long about your liberal slant, as long as it doesn't affect me, but the day you start passing liberal laws and putting in supreme court justices who are left leaning is where I draw the line.

#8 | Posted by boaz at 2017-12-26 04:02 PM

...and putting in supreme court justices who are left leaning is where I draw the line.

Why? You're obviously OK with the concept:

I want someone who is going to put conservative judges on the bench.
Trump is doing just fine.

POSTED BY BOAZ AT 2017-12-19 07:51 PM

You are not really concerned with what they do, just who is doing it. Correct?

#9 | Posted by REDIAL at 2017-12-26 04:08 PM

The problem comes in when the "other side" starts making policy decisions based on their ideological beliefs.

The problem is there is no "other side".

We are all Americans. WE are all on the same "side".

The President and Congress just picked your pockets and you are perfectly ok with that.

THAT is the problem.

#10 | Posted by donnerboy at 2017-12-26 04:09 PM

The problem is there is no "other side".

We are all Americans. WE are all on the same "side".

The President and Congress just picked your pockets and you are perfectly ok with that.

THAT is the problem.

Posted by donnerboy at 2017-12-26 04:09 PM | Reply

Yet he is perfectly ok to force his bigoted ideas on everyone else. Physician heal thyself.

#11 | Posted by LauraMohr at 2017-12-26 04:29 PM

I can listen to you talk all day long about your liberal slant, as long as it doesn't affect me, but the day you start passing liberal laws and putting in supreme court justices who are left leaning is where I draw the line.

#8 | Posted by boaz

But yet you're just fine with you doing that to "liberals".

Face it. You're just a bigger snowflake than those evil "liberals" you rag on day in and day out.

#12 | Posted by jpw at 2017-12-26 04:41 PM

The problem is there is no "other side".

We are all Americans. WE are all on the same "side".

If that were the case, Obamacare wouldnt have been shoved down our throats with no Republican support.

Same with the tax plan..

#13 | Posted by boaz at 2017-12-26 06:26 PM

Re #13

Stop buying into the hype.

The only division is that which you feed into.

By the way. Both plans were Republican plans.

#14 | Posted by donnerboy at 2017-12-26 06:37 PM

If that were the case, Obamacare wouldnt have been shoved down our throats with no Republican support.

Same with the tax plan..

Posted by boaz at 2017-12-26 06:26 PM | Reply

Not even remotely factually honest Boaz. ObamaCare enjoyed 13 months of debates including public ones. It was open to both sides but the GOP Refused to work with Obama(Abject Racism). The tax bill on the other hand rushed through with no debates.THAT was shoved down our throats.

#15 | Posted by LauraMohr at 2017-12-26 06:39 PM

Well, we are all human beings. The similarities between Republicans and the rest of humanity ends there. There may be a time when I will feel more empathy, but I doubt it. The sooner the sad racist human beings that walk in lock-step with Trumpian -------- age-out or otherwise stop wasting oxygen and bandwidth, the better. To befriend such ilk is to acknowledge their incredibly evil philosophy is worth a seat at the table. And I, a 72 year old white male retiree living on Social Security and my IRA, would dance on the graves of the most heinous of the lot. The rest aren't worth having their gravestones washed with the urine out of my bladder

#16 | Posted by paltroon1 at 2017-12-26 08:40 PM

"If that were the case, Obamacare wouldnt have been shoved down our throats with no Republican support.

#13 | POSTED BY BOAZ "

This is simply not true. This link, although approaching the issue of the public debate of Obamacare from a different perspective, clearly indicates you are wrong:

www.snopes.com

Here are some relevant extracts:

"Hearings and public testimony - the ACA was debated in three House committees and two Senate committees, and subject to hours of bipartisan debate that allowed for the introduction of amendments."

"Independent assessment - Another tool intended to promote transparency and open governance is an independent audit of the financial ramifications of a bill by the nonpartisan Congressional Budget Office (CBO). While numerous bills eventually coalesced into what became the ACA, the CBO provided numerous reports on multiple aspects of the law ahead of its vote in the Senate."

"Bipartisan debate - In June and July 2009, with Democrats in charge, the Senate health committee spent nearly 60 hours over 13 days marking up the bill that became the Affordable Care Act. That September and October, the Senate Finance Committee worked on the legislation for eight days -- its longest markup in two decades. It considered more than 130 amendments and held 79 roll-call votes. The full Senate debated the health care bill for 25 straight days before passing it on Dec. 24, 2009."

It is true that there was no Republican support, but anyone with a ounce of objectivity understands that was party politics.

If you have to knowingly lie to feel comfortable with a policy decision taken by your party, perhaps you need to look more closely at your party.


#17 | Posted by Foreigner at 2017-12-26 08:53 PM

Boazo lying his snowflake Nazi lovin' ass off again.
I bet he's lying about his ethnic background as well as his military backround.

He's just an angry Teajadist fat white guy living In his moms basement playing call of duty on-line all day with his "militia friends" is very likely.

#18 | Posted by aborted_monson at 2017-12-26 11:28 PM

Boazo lying his snowflake Nazi lovin' ass off again.
I bet he's lying about his ethnic background as well as his military backround.

He's just an angry Teajadist fat white guy living In his moms basement playing call of duty on-line all day with his "militia friends" is very likely.

#19 | Posted by aborted_monson at 2017-12-26 11:30 PM

"There may be a time when I will feel more empathy, but I doubt it. "

So do I. You're a little old to be so bitter and emotional, don't you think?

#20 | Posted by eberly at 2017-12-27 12:02 AM

I feel empathy for trumptilian morons. Plenty of it. But i also believe in good old fashioned lessons learned the hard way. Trumptilians should have learned from Dumbya, but they didn't. They doubled down on the self destructive nonsense. Good for them. I wish nothing but pain on them for their decisions. I wish them poor jobs with no benefit or security, no welfare for troubled times, no healthcare to cover their ass cancer. I wish them poisoned air and water, that their houses get blown away by hurricanes or flooded by over developed rivers. I wish the children the choose not to abort turn out to be gay. I wish poor education on them, piss poor internet access and black lung disease. I hope they get some weird ass side effect from prescription meds that they can't class action sue over. I hope all of these economic problems are compounded by illegal banking actions that cause them to lose their houses and declare bankruptcy, which won't permit them to get rid of debt. I hope they get shot by police. I hope they end up in jail for some petty crime that destroys their lives.

Mostly I hope they get what they wish for.

You really should be careful what you wish for cause Truth Hurts.

#21 | Posted by truthhurts at 2017-12-27 12:20 AM

I don't know what kind of community you folks live in, but I live in one where Roy Moore was considered a good guy, because he lies about his faith, and because he has a 'R' after his name. By their own reckoning, they simply cannot conceive of someone who would risk eternity in hell, just for a few bucks or a little power. They listen to the charlatans who only want to inspire fear in them and they vote accordingly. They do this because they see their religion dying and they are very willing to believe the charlatans who claim it is dying because of liberals.

I am not going to ostracize myself from that community just because it has a majority of uneducated idiots. I can teach them things and I do. Just me telling folks that is is okay for them to follow their own gut feeling gave some people affirmation and courage. I also insist on them consulting their own religious works as guidance (because every religion is more moral than our politicians).

If I had told them, 'you are stupid and your favorite politicians are charlatans and my favorite politicians are saints', then roy moore would have been elected.

#22 | Posted by kudzu at 2017-12-27 12:25 PM

Roy Moore was a bad candidate, just like Hillary.

Anyone else would have won that seat. It will go back to Republican next election cycle.

#23 | Posted by boaz at 2017-12-27 01:32 PM

Roy Moore was a bad candidate, just like Hillary.

Unlike Hillary he did not win the popular vote.

If the women had not come forward he probably would have won that seat (bad candidate or not).

Yet 48.4 percent of the voters still voted for his Theocratic Fantasyland.

#24 | Posted by donnerboy at 2017-12-27 02:12 PM

One is never too old to detest racist, misogynistic, and morally corrupt people. Republicans taking food, shelter and medical care away from the poor, trashing individual rights, whoring themselves to an incredibly unqualified psychotic, ignorant and immature person masquerading as a president while selling integrity to the highest bidder deserve no respect from me or any other sane, caring person. Hypocrisy and subterfuge are their rallying calls. I am not a bitter old man, I am an angry old man. Angered that the country I love has contracted this festering infection. I am also a determined old man, determined that whatever time I have left on the planet be spent doing my best to right these wrongs. Smugness is worse than bitterness. You should reflect on that.

#25 | Posted by paltroon1 at 2017-12-27 04:23 PM

One is never too old to detest racist, misogynistic, and morally corrupt people. Republicans taking food, shelter and medical care away from the poor, trashing individual rights, whoring themselves to an incredibly unqualified psychotic, ignorant and immature person masquerading as a president while selling integrity to the highest bidder deserve no respect from me or any other sane, caring person. Hypocrisy and subterfuge are their rallying calls. I am not a bitter old man, I am an angry old man. Angered that the country I love has contracted this festering infection. I am also a determined old man, determined that whatever time I have left on the planet be spent doing my best to right these wrongs. Smugness is worse than bitterness. You should reflect on that.

#25 | Posted by paltroon1 at 2017-12-27 04:23 PM | Reply | Flag:

I have always considered myself open to differing points of view. I've always believed a little give-and-take, the left and right hashing it out, was a healthy thing. I've always believed that truth wins in the end, that this emerging truth slowly but inexorably leads to a more just world. Liberalism says change now because justice demands it. Conservatism says hold on there; let's maintain order and continue the thread of our culture. While I consider myself liberal, I have made an effort all my life to understand, respect and work with conservatives.

Trump, however, has made it very difficult to see the value in continuing to operate this way. He's so incredibly arrogant and wrong-headed that my instinct is to fight him at every turn. I truly do not believe he has the best interests of our country at heart. I'm appalled that his supporters are oblivious to this.

I do love the story, though, Gal_Tuesday. I need reminders like these.

#26 | Posted by cbob at 2017-12-27 05:40 PM

Diversity of company and a discussion with those offering differing viewpoints is generally a good thing. But at least 9 of 10 Trump voters are such fumb ducks that it's a complete waste of time to even talk to them. They are mostly racist and many completely ignore facts.

#27 | Posted by Snowfake at 2017-12-27 11:17 PM

Healthy 30 year old without health insurance, something terrible happens, what is going to happen?

F**k the Tea Party.

www.youtube.com

#28 | Posted by danni at 2017-12-28 06:31 AM

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