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Thursday, July 14, 2016

The Republican National Convention will be the most fabulous convention in the history of our country. And I don't just mean most fabulous political convention. No real estate convention, medical convention or even pornography convention has ever put on an extravaganza quite like what you will see in Cleveland, believe me. Don't listen to the lyin' media about convention speakers. My phone has been ringing off the hook with people who want to speak and help begin the process of Making America Great Again. We have more requests for speaking slots than probably any presidential candidate has ever had, that I can tell you. Far, far more than we can accommodate.


Happened before, even worse then this.


And one absolute classic I remember but can't find anywhere.

Day 4 speaker list.

Mary Fallin, governor of Oklahoma
Does that name yearn for some obligatory jokes or what … but now is not the time. Solid conservative political career, while not my cup of tea, appropriate for the occasion. Good pick.

Reince Priebus, chairman of the R.N.C.
Is that Latin for … never mind. Again, perfect and logical speaker.

Jerry Falwell, Jr., president of Liberty University
Good god. Do these ecclesiastic people know that Donald is a bit more religious than me, and I'm zero religious? Falwell brings a stellar resume to the plate: against abolishing apartheid calling Desmond Tutu a phony, claimed Bill Clinton was involved in murder and cocaine trafficking, thinks educational institutions are breeding ground for atheists, claimed 911 "was probably deserved" because of the rise of feminists, gays and non-believers, and last but not least, there's a gay Teletubbie. This guy belongs in an insane asylum, not on the RNC platform. I'd rather see Scott Baio debating a chair. Loserest choice ever!

Peter Thiel, a co-founder of PayPal
Young, libertarian, very successful businessman with good philanthropy work. Well done.

Ivanka Trump, one of Donald J. Trump's daughters
Oooooh goody, Czech blood like myself, and that's where the similarities end. She really hasn't done anything but be Donald's daughter and that will be her task, introduce dad as "The Next President of the United States" (gagging as I type this).

Donald J. Trump, Republican presidential nominee
He is what he is. We will get what we expect. And we will be divided like never before.

Take out nutjob Falwell, it's a pretty good line up if you ask me.

Let's see what day 3 looks like with another 27 Yankees line up.

Leading off: Laura Ingraham, Radio Host
She has her own fanpage: www.lauraingrahamsucks.com.

Phil Ruffin, Businessman
Business partner of Trump so let the obligatory ---------- begin.

Pam Bondi, Attorney General of Florida
A Trump product with a history of receiving questionable campaign contributions and ties to America's finest educational outfit: Trump University

Eileen Collins, Astronaut (retired)
Nice background, no problem with her at all, plans to make a non-political message. We shall see.

Michelle Van Etten, Small Business Owner
"Michelle Van Etten is a small business owner who was recently featured in The Greatest Networkers in the World second edition. Michelle employs over 100,000 people and is a strong supporter of Donald Trump, knowing his policies will support businesses all across America." What??? They must be very, very small people.

Kentucky State Senator Ralph Alvarado, Jr.
Let's throw in the token Latino that no one has every heard of.

Darrell Scott, Pastor
It just wasn't enough that Ben Carson mentioned God 375 times last night.

Harold Hamm, Continental Resources
Don't know this guy but his business background is excellent.

Wisconsin Governor Scott Walker
Obviously I don't agree with his politics but at least Trump got a big name that people can recognize.

Lynne Patton, The Eric Trump Foundation
More ---------- stooges.

U.S. Senator Marco Rubio (R-Florida)
I can't believe Rubio accepted an appearance.

U.S. Senator Ted Cruz (R-Texas)

Eric Trump, Executive Vice President of The Trump Organization
Ditto on the butt kissing.

Newt & Callista Gingrich, Former Speaker of the House and his wife
Dinosaur time.

Indiana Governor Mike Pence, Presumptive candidate for Vice President
This could potential be quite interesting.

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