Drudge Retort: The Other Side of the News
Saturday, September 17, 2016

Scientists have discovered a powerful new strain of fact-resistant humans who are threatening the ability of Earth to sustain life, a sobering new study reports. The research, conducted by the University of Minnesota, identifies a virulent strain of humans who are virtually immune to any form of verifiable knowledge, leaving scientists at a loss as to how to combat them. "These humans appear to have all the faculties necessary to receive and process information," Davis Logsdon, one of the scientists who contributed to the study, said. "And yet, somehow, they have developed defenses that, for all intents and purposes, have rendered those faculties totally inactive." More worryingly, Logsdon said, "As facts have multiplied, their defenses against those facts have only grown more powerful."

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While scientists have no clear understanding of the mechanisms that prevent the fact-resistant humans from absorbing data, they theorize that the strain may have developed the ability to intercept and discard information en route from the auditory nerve to the brain.

"The normal functions of human consciousness have been completely nullified," Logsdon said.

While reaffirming the gloomy assessments of the study, Logsdon held out hope that the threat of fact-resistant humans could be mitigated in the future. "Our research is very preliminary, but it's possible that they will become more receptive to facts once they are in an environment without food, water or oxygen," he said.

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Admin's note: Participants in this discussion must follow the site's moderation policy. Profanity will be filtered. Abusive conduct is not allowed.

Well I don't know why I came here tonight,
I got the feeling that something ain't right,
I'm so scared in case I fall off my chair,
And I'm wondering how I'll get down the stairs,
Stein Clowns to the left of me,
Climate Denier Jokers to the right, here I am,
Stuck in the middle with you

#1 | Posted by Corky at 2016-09-14 01:42 AM | Reply

Sadly, humans have been stubbornly fact-resistant since they evolved from apes.

#2 | Posted by JeffJ at 2016-09-14 01:44 AM | Reply

I only read the thread summary and I found it funny (in a good way). That bodes well.

#3 | Posted by JeffJ at 2016-09-14 01:46 AM | Reply

. "Our research is very preliminary, but it's possible that they will become more receptive to facts once they are in an environment without food, water, or oxygen," he said."

They may be onto something....

#4 | Posted by Corky at 2016-09-14 01:47 AM | Reply

#4

Deprive a hungover man of Taco Bell and his fact-resistance drops precipitously.

#5 | Posted by JeffJ at 2016-09-14 01:49 AM | Reply

Take away a stoner's Cheetos and.... well, he probably won't even notice.

#6 | Posted by Corky at 2016-09-14 01:50 AM | Reply

But, take away his Rice Crispy treats.....

#7 | Posted by JeffJ at 2016-09-14 01:53 AM | Reply

Bedways is rightways for me, Cork.

As always, thanks for the laughs.

Best regards.

#8 | Posted by JeffJ at 2016-09-14 01:56 AM | Reply

Ditto, kiddo.

#9 | Posted by Corky at 2016-09-14 01:58 AM | Reply

So true, yes, so true. Facts like repeal of Glass-Steagall, passage of Securities Modernization Act and omnibus crime bill, end of welfare as previously known, then to top it off with NAFTA with more of the same just around the corner.

#10 | Posted by nutcase at 2016-09-14 11:56 AM | Reply

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#10 Nutcase, I'll take 1994 over 2004 any day of the week twice on Sunday.

#11 | Posted by bocaink at 2016-09-14 03:55 PM | Reply

People generally believe what they want, and ignore what they disagree with. This has been true sense the dawn of time.

#12 | Posted by docnjo at 2016-09-14 04:05 PM | Reply

It's easy to dismiss these people as stupid, but many of them aren't. There's something else at work here.

#13 | Posted by SomebodyElse at 2016-09-17 06:11 PM | Reply

Yes these humans are members of the Global warming Cult they worship at its alter and refuse to listen to any science that proves them wrong. They are a threat to all life on earth.

#14 | Posted by tmaster at 2016-09-17 07:25 PM | Reply

New factoids out of no less, Minnesota.

#15 | Posted by hobart at 2016-09-17 07:37 PM | Reply

I think it is a sort of information overload. As our society has gained more easy access to information, it seems that there is a significant segment of people that, instead of trying to parse that large amount of information to build their opinions, just ignore information that doesn't agree with the opinions that they already have.

#16 | Posted by gtbritishskull at 2016-09-17 08:29 PM | Reply

Time makes more converts than reason.
- Thomas Paine

#17 | Posted by LEgregius at 2016-09-17 09:28 PM | Reply

Ah, but then again, there are facts, and there are libby backed' scientists' facts: for example - Hockey Stick anyone?

#18 | Posted by MSgt at 2016-09-17 09:37 PM | Reply

members of the Global warming Cult they worship at its alter and refuse to listen to any science that proves them wrong

Deniers have yet to produce such science.

Largely because it would first require actually understanding what science is and how it works.

#19 | Posted by jpw at 2016-09-18 12:23 AM | Reply | Newsworthy 1

Ah, but then again, there are facts, and there are libby backed' scientists' facts: for example - Hockey Stick anyone?

en.wikipedia.org

Yeah. Science is awful. Terrible. Has never amounted to anything.

#20 | Posted by jpw at 2016-09-18 12:26 AM | Reply

I think it is a sort of information overload.

I think it's a large amount of people are just dumb.

#21 | Posted by jpw at 2016-09-18 12:35 AM | Reply

#21 Some of the posts here add credence to your theory.

#22 | Posted by squinch at 2016-09-18 06:56 AM | Reply

#11, agreed, but you do understand, hopefully that the US economy is like a mile long train? When you change policy there is a time lag in the response.

#23 | Posted by nutcase at 2016-09-18 07:28 AM | Reply

"Earth Endangered by New Fact-Resistant Humans." A study...by University of Minnesota? New label for people not buying into the progressive dogma? A singular alleged scientific study, without third party verification, being touted as gospel? Yep, these are the usual indicators of left wing intolerance of other people's views on any given subject. Ignore this screed if you value your property (personal income), intellectual freedom, and freedom of speech.

#24 | Posted by Verneoz at 2016-09-18 09:25 AM | Reply

Verne has a lot to learn. You know what I mean Verne?

In the same general period that scientists first suspected climate change and ice ages, Joseph Fourier, in 1824, found that Earth's atmosphere kept the planet warmer than would be the case in a vacuum. Fourier recognized that the atmosphere transmitted visible light waves efficiently to the earth's surface. The earth then absorbed visible light and emitted infrared radiation in response, but the atmosphere did not transmit infrared efficiently, which therefore increased surface temperatures. He also suspected that human activities could influence climate, although he focused primarily on land use changes. In an 1827 paper Fourier stated, "The establishment and progress of human societies, the action of natural forces, can notably change, and in vast regions, the state of the surface, the distribution of water and the great movements of the air. Such effects are able to make to vary, in the course of many centuries, the average degree of heat; because the analytic expressions contain coefficients relating to the state of the surface and which greatly influence the temperature."

Ice cores drilled by a Franco-Soviet team at the Vostok Station in Antarctica showed that CO2 and temperature had gone up and down together in wide swings through past ice ages. This confirmed the CO2-temperature relationship in a manner entirely independent of computer climate models, strongly reinforcing the emerging scientific consensus. The findings also pointed to powerful biological and geochemical feedbacks.

#25 | Posted by nutcase at 2016-09-18 06:32 PM | Reply

Ignore this screed if you value your property (personal income), intellectual freedom, and freedom of speech.

Please stay safely ignorant by not reading anything.
Wouldn't want you precious snowflakes to melt.

#26 | Posted by snoofy at 2016-09-18 06:35 PM | Reply

Fact resistance.

YEP.

#28 | Posted by BruceBanner at 2016-09-18 11:27 PM | Reply

Logic resistance.

YEP.

#29 | Posted by BruceBanner at 2016-09-18 11:27 PM | Reply

Yeah. Science is awful. Terrible. Has never amounted to anything.

#20 | POSTED BY JPW AT 2016-09-18 12:26 AM | FLAG: The majority of us have no problem with real, undistorted science.

#30 | Posted by MSgt at 2016-09-18 11:46 PM | Reply

But what do we do about the people who don't believe in evolution?
Why are they even given a voice in politics? They're intellectually repugnant.

You can believe what you want, but keep it out of public schools. Why is this not possible for so many right-wing Christians?

I figured I should as you, since you vote with that bloc.

What's their deal? Do you know?

#31 | Posted by snoofy at 2016-09-19 01:12 AM | Reply

The majority of us have no problem with real, undistorted science.

#30 | POSTED BY MSGT AT 2016-09-18 11:46 PM | FLAG:

The problem is that people can't identify the difference.

#32 | Posted by BruceBanner at 2016-09-19 12:13 PM | Reply | Newsworthy 1

#32

NW

#33 | Posted by eberly at 2016-09-19 01:18 PM | Reply

Please explain how anybody fighting global warming harms the earth in any way.

#34 | Posted by hatter5183 at 2016-09-19 02:50 PM | Reply

Wow. You just proved conservatives do not understand sarcasm

#35 | Posted by hatter5183 at 2016-09-19 02:51 PM | Reply

Earth Endangered by New Fact-Resistant Humans

I wouldn't say they're NEW. Religion has always created these types of people.

But there is new strain of them unattached to religion, who live in the right wing propaganda bubble. That's why they are starting their own social network, so they can have social media without being exposed to real information.

Most of the new version was created by the fossil fuel profiteers who needed to create doubt in the concept of science. Since science said their product was a threat to human life, they are defending their profits by attacking science itself.

And as you can see on this website, all the dumbest morons fall for it, because they didn't like or understand science to begin with, so it feels good for them to hear that they shouldn't accept science anyway.

#36 | Posted by SpeakSoftly at 2016-09-19 03:10 PM | Reply | Newsworthy 1

All joking aside, there clearly is a correlation between being 'fact resistant' and being a 'deplorable'. The more a person relies on prejudices and bigotry the less they rely on factual truth.

#37 | Posted by moder8 at 2016-09-19 04:02 PM | Reply

All joking aside, there clearly is a correlation between being 'fact resistant' and being a 'deplorable'. The more a person relies on prejudices and bigotry the less they rely on factual truth.

#37 | Posted by moder8

The common denominator being a low IQ.

#38 | Posted by SpeakSoftly at 2016-09-19 06:23 PM | Reply

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