Drudge Retort: The Other Side of the News
Wednesday, July 30, 2014

A Republican elected to Alabama's Public Service Commission opposed new EPA coal plant regulations on the grounds that coal was created in Alabama by God, and the federal government should not enact policy that runs counter to God's plan. "Who has the right to take what God's given a state?" said commissioner-elect Chip Beeker at a press conference. Commission president Twinkle Andress Cavanaugh called on the people of the state to ask for God's intervention and said, "We will not stand for what they are doing to our way of life in Alabama." The press conference was held in the offices of the Alabama Coal Association.

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HeliumRat

 

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Last year Cavanaugh presided over a meeting of the commission that opened with a prayer against gay marriage and reproductive rights.

The commission is the government body that sets rates that utility companies charge their customers for electricity.

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Not just any god.... his god.....

#1 | Posted by AndreaMackris at 2014-07-29 08:10 PM | Reply | Flag:

Then they should give the profits to God, right?

#2 | Posted by HeliumRat at 2014-07-29 08:14 PM | Reply | Flag: | Funny: 1 | Newsworthy 1

I always thought coal was made by Satan, just like dinosaur fossils.

#3 | Posted by HeliumRat at 2014-07-29 08:21 PM | Reply | Flag:

Then they should give the profits to God, right?
#2 | POSTED BY HELIUMRAT

Well..... the pope.... same thing...

I always thought coal was made by Satan, just like dinosaur fossils.
#3 | POSTED BY HELIUMRAT

Nah, that is the SatanSandwich.

"But who prays for Satan? Who, in eighteen centuries, has had the common humanity to pray for the one sinner that needed it most?" -- . Mark Twain.

#4 | Posted by AndreaMackris at 2014-07-29 09:53 PM | Reply | Flag:

He's wrong.

God told me the federal government can do what it wants with coal.

That's why god declared manifest destiny.

In order to strengthen the federal government and deliver unto them coal.

#5 | Posted by ClownShack at 2014-07-29 10:13 PM | Reply | Flag: | Funny: 1

"coal was created in Alabama by God, and the federal government should not enact policy that runs counter to God's plan."

Stones in Alabama were created by God, too, but I don't think He'd mind if Alabama left the Stone Age.

#6 | Posted by northguy3 at 2014-07-29 11:27 PM | Reply | Flag: | Funny: 2

"But who prays for Satan? Who, in eighteen centuries, has had the common humanity to pray for the one sinner that needed it most?" -- . Mark Twain.
#4 | Posted by AndreaMackris at 2014-07-29 09:53 PM

Absolutely.

But coal exploitation has little to do with answered prayers and everything to do with parasite corporations. It just happens that many of the selfish Republican constituents are easily led by the nose into hell, but at least they don't mind taking us all with them.

#7 | Posted by redlightrobot at 2014-07-29 11:48 PM | Reply | Flag:

After we cure cancer there will be those who think fondly of tumors.

#8 | Posted by Harry_Powell at 2014-07-30 01:30 AM | Reply | Flag:

#4 | Posted by AndreaMackris

Nah, that is the SatanSandwich.

Um, isn't that two gay people...?

#9 | Posted by HeliumRat at 2014-07-30 08:03 AM | Reply | Flag:

www.biblegateway.com

13 Let everyone be subject to the governing authorities, for there is no authority except that which God has established. The authorities that exist have been established by God. 2 Consequently, whoever rebels against the authority is rebelling against what God has instituted, and those who do so will bring judgment on themselves. 3 For rulers hold no terror for those who do right, but for those who do wrong. Do you want to be free from fear of the one in authority? Then do what is right and you will be commended. 4 For the one in authority is God's servant for your good. But if you do wrong, be afraid, for rulers do not bear the sword for no reason. They are God's servants, agents of wrath to bring punishment on the wrongdoer. 5 Therefore, it is necessary to submit to the authorities, not only because of possible punishment but also as a matter of conscience.

#10 | Posted by LarryMohr at 2014-07-30 08:16 AM | Reply | Flag:

The absolute ignorance expressed by the Alabama Public Service Commission demonstrates exactly why we need a federal agency like the EPA to dictate standards that these yahoos can hate but can't overrule. Let me just say....THANK GOD FOR THE EPA!

#11 | Posted by danni at 2014-07-30 10:10 AM | Reply | Flag:

"coal was created in Alabama by God, and the federal government should not enact policy that runs counter to God's plan."


And that very same G-d hid it deep underground to keep those rednecks from getting their hands on it.

Why do they violate G-d's will by digging the stuff He so carefully hid, up?

#12 | Posted by kanrei at 2014-07-30 10:12 AM | Reply | Flag:

How do they know that invisible sky grandpa didn't put all that coal there to test them?

Will you use this resource responsiblity or will you just be a bunch of greedy idiots with it?

#13 | Posted by Sully at 2014-07-30 10:40 AM | Reply | Flag:

Oh Alabama
The devil fools
with the best laid plan.

#14 | Posted by CrisisStills at 2014-07-30 11:12 AM | Reply | Flag:

Science is the devils language and scientists agents of lucifer. Hail satan!

1 Timothy 6:19-21King James Version (KJV)
19 Laying up in store for themselves a good foundation against the time to come, that they may lay hold on eternal life.
20 O Timothy, keep that which is committed to thy trust, avoiding profane and vain babblings, and oppositions of science falsely so called:
21 Which some professing have erred concerning the faith. Grace be with thee. Amen.

#15 | Posted by soulfly at 2014-07-30 12:46 PM | Reply | Flag:

You left-wing knee-jerks are as bad as the wingnut knee-jerks.

The only part you got right was that the APSC is engaging is some typical religion-based lying, but it's not about coal.

It's about tar sands. There has been a huge reserve of tar sands discovered that covers most of northern alabama and mississippi. It's called the hartselle formation. My house is sitting on top of it.

Eventually, they are gonna have to convince grandma and grandpa that they would be doing jesus a real solid if they sold the family farm to the oil companies.

#16 | Posted by kudzu at 2014-07-30 04:04 PM | Reply | Flag: | Funny: 1

"Who has the right to take what God's given a state?"

Apparently coal miners do.
Take the things that G-d gave you and set them on fire.
There's no better way to worship.

#17 | Posted by snoofy at 2014-07-30 04:48 PM | Reply | Flag:

Hell, the right uses religion to get elected by the morons every time, why not use it to help their pollution profiteers as well?

#18 | Posted by SpeakSoftly at 2014-07-30 05:16 PM | Reply | Flag: | Newsworthy 1

Ugh, some many good, rationale reasons to use coal until something better comes along. He could argue coal is a by-product of natural processes, we are by-products of natural processes, and hence have every right to extract coal (in a responsible way, which isn't always done I know). He could argue it is a state's right to use its natural resources as it sees fit without interference from the every authoritarian EPA

These people should stop calling themselves republicans, because they are fascist theocratics.

... why we need a federal agency like the EPA to dictate standards that these yahoos can hate but can't overrule. Let me just say....THANK GOD FOR THE EPA!
#11 | Posted by danni at 2014-07-30 10:10 AM | Reply | Flag

what happens when the EPA becomes full yahoos? Who will override them, the UN? What happens when the UN becomes a bunch of yahoos?

hotair.com

#19 | Posted by danv at 2014-07-30 06:08 PM | Reply | Flag:

Take the things that G-d gave you and set them on fire.
There's no better way to worship.

#17 | POSTED BY SNOOFY

I dunno....

Sacrificial virgins?

#20 | Posted by AndreaMackris at 2014-07-30 06:19 PM | Reply | Flag:

It's about tar sands. - Kudzu

Tar Sands, Tar Sands.... Where is Nulli?

#21 | Posted by AndreaMackris at 2014-07-30 06:20 PM | Reply | Flag:

THANK GOD FOR THE EPA!
#11 | Posted by danni

As Snoofy says.... set them on fire!

#22 | Posted by AndreaMackris at 2014-07-30 06:21 PM | Reply | Flag:

What?

If God regulation violates God's will then guns existence does the same thing.

#23 | Posted by Tor at 2014-07-30 06:30 PM | Reply | Flag:

*Rephrase*

What?

If COAL regulation violates God's will then guns existence does the same thing.

#24 | Posted by Tor at 2014-07-30 06:39 PM | Reply | Flag:

"what happens when the EPA becomes full yahoos? Who will override them, the UN?"

1. The President
2. Congress
3. Supreme Court

#25 | Posted by danni at 2014-07-30 06:58 PM | Reply | Flag:

The problems for the coal industry are being caused by the natural gas industry, didn't God also create natural gas?

#26 | Posted by danni at 2014-07-30 06:59 PM | Reply | Flag:

The problems for the coal industry are being caused by the natural gas industry, didn't God also create natural gas?

Posted by danni at 2014-07-30 06:59 PM | Reply

Nahhhhhhhh that's Mother Nature's farts. Why do you think it's called NATURAL Gas.

#27 | Posted by LarryMohr at 2014-07-30 07:07 PM | Reply | Flag: | Funny: 1

My favorite part of the story is that these Alabama officials are named "Chip" and "Twinkle." They sound like Disney characters.

#28 | Posted by anton at 2014-07-30 09:32 PM | Reply | Flag:

That does it. From now on, anyone who uses "God's will" as an argument gets public execution.

Too far?

#29 | Posted by TheTom at 2014-07-31 01:08 AM | Reply | Flag:

God gave us cannibis and the poppy and happy mushrooms,why would god fearing people take that away from me...I mean us.

#30 | Posted by bruceaz at 2014-07-31 01:21 AM | Reply | Flag:

oh yeah?

well, uh, alabama violates gawud's will! (so says i!)

what now?

#31 | Posted by Zarathustra at 2014-07-31 02:47 AM | Reply | Flag:

"what happens when the EPA becomes full yahoos? Who will override them, the UN?"

1. The President
2. Congress
3. Supreme Court

#25 | Posted by danni at 2014-07-30 06:58 PM | Reply | Flag:

Yeah think again, there already full of yahoos

#32 | Posted by danv at 2014-07-31 04:48 PM | Reply | Flag:

God told me the federal government can do what it wants with coal.

That's why god declared manifest destiny.

In order to strengthen the federal government and deliver unto them coal.

#5 | Posted by ClownShack

oh yeah?

well, uh, alabama violates gawud's will! (so says i!)

what now?

#31 | Posted by Zarathustra

"The Lord says he can get me out of this mess, but he's pretty sure you're (both) F-ed."

#33 | Posted by donnerboy at 2014-07-31 06:34 PM | Reply | Flag:

..since dinosaurs existed 4300 yrs ago, that would explain why god has an affinity for coal...he rode the Velociraptor..

#34 | Posted by drewinnj at 2014-07-31 07:37 PM | Reply | Flag:

..he rode the Velociraptor..

Until it got velociraptured.

#35 | Posted by northguy3 at 2014-07-31 09:54 PM | Reply | Flag:

**** So we must deduce that GOD also gave Alabama "Hooded Clan Outfits!"

#36 | Posted by AntiCadillac at 2014-07-31 10:11 PM | Reply | Flag:

This is why religion does not belong in government because you can make up whatever bullcrap you want and say it's gods will.

Religion is simply the control over the weak.

#37 | Posted by pragmatous at 2014-07-31 11:19 PM | Reply | Flag:

Religion is simply the control over the weak.
#37 | Posted by pragmatous at 2014-07-31 11:19 PM | Reply | Flag:

Ah yes, and you are sooo strong, you don't need religion. It takes a big man to bad mouth religion living in the golden age of human civilization. You wouldn't last a week living in the conditions, say, of the dark ages. If you got sent back there right now, odds are, you kill yourself rather than endure. You are a slightly evolved talking ape, so have some humility and respect for our ancestors that did believe.

Remember you wouldn't exist nor would America if it was not for religion.

P.S. you welcome

#38 | Posted by danv at 2014-08-01 12:09 AM | Reply | Flag:

#38 | POSTED BY DANV

It's ironic that you'd reference the dark ages considering that period was mostly a struggle between orthodox christians and catholics. The Dark Ages was basically religion trying to establish control at the expense of everything else, ie, the strong ruling over the weak.

As for America, the original intent was to exploit the land for resources that the european countries stripped from their own land. America as we know it was a byproduct, but not the original intent.

Religion should guide your life, not rule it, and definitely not try to make it conform to whatever you wanted to enrich yourself.

#39 | Posted by Lohocla at 2014-08-01 06:40 AM | Reply | Flag:

Religion with superstitious variants was in complete control during the dark ages.

There is no god, only workers and opportunistic liars.

#40 | Posted by nutcase at 2014-08-01 02:52 PM | Reply | Flag:

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