Drudge Retort: The Other Side of the News
Wednesday, March 06, 2013

A lion killed a woman while she was having sex in the bush with her boyfriend, reports have emerged. He managed to escape wearing nothing but a condom.

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justanoversight

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Bad kitty.

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Sex in the bush? Darn that M word policy. The possibilites are endless here.

#1 | Posted by gracieamazed at 2013-03-06 10:58 AM | Reply | Flag:

DOn't have sex with lions.

#2 | Posted by kanrei at 2013-03-06 11:00 AM | Reply | Flag:

He didn't have to out run the lion, he only had to out run her.

#3 | Posted by paneocon at 2013-03-06 11:19 AM | Reply | Flag:


He didn't have to out run the lion, he only had to out run her.

#3 | Posted by paneocon at 2013-03-06 11:19 AM |

Reminds me of the great saying: INcase of Zombie Attack, surround yourself with slower people.

#4 | Posted by kanrei at 2013-03-06 11:21 AM | Reply | Flag:

And good job Retort ads. As my #4 appeared, so did an ad for a shirt that says "In case of Zombie Apocalypse, I'm Tripping You."

#5 | Posted by kanrei at 2013-03-06 11:22 AM | Reply | Flag:

Sex in the bush?
#1 | POSTED BY GRACIEAMAZED

Yeah, I found the mention of sex in the bush to be a bit redundant.

#6 | Posted by justanoversight at 2013-03-06 11:46 AM | Reply | Flag:

I bet a car antennae would have saved her.

#7 | Posted by 726 at 2013-03-06 12:03 PM | Reply | Flag:

I thought the female body had ways of preventing that.

#8 | Posted by zeropointnrg at 2013-03-06 12:17 PM | Reply | Flag:

"He managed to escape wearing nothing but a condom."

Safe sex turned out not to be very safe.

#9 | Posted by danni at 2013-03-06 12:18 PM | Reply | Flag:

Dunno Danni. He wore a condom and lived. She relied on him to provide protection and died.

#10 | Posted by kanrei at 2013-03-06 12:19 PM | Reply | Flag:

Having sex in a bush can't be the most enjoyable experience. Spiders, ants and decaying leaves. What a turn on!

#11 | Posted by moder8 at 2013-03-06 12:22 PM | Reply | Flag:

Reminds me of a Gahan Wilson cartoon.

"Gosh Ranger Bob, I love it when you growl and scream."

#12 | Posted by Zatoichi at 2013-03-06 12:23 PM | Reply | Flag:

Condoms...they also protect you from lions.

#13 | Posted by kanrei at 2013-03-06 12:24 PM | Reply | Flag:

Practice safe sex - wear a condum

#14 | Posted by Doc_Sarvis at 2013-03-06 12:33 PM | Reply | Flag:

Apparently those condoms really do provide protection.

#15 | Posted by TrueBlue at 2013-03-06 01:01 PM | Reply | Flag:

Apparently those condoms really do provide protection.

#15 | Posted by TrueBlue

Not to mention the traction factor...

#16 | Posted by American1st at 2013-03-06 01:18 PM | Reply | Flag:

Obviously, that lion wanted a piece of the action.

#17 | Posted by matsop at 2013-03-06 01:30 PM | Reply | Flag:


Obviously, that lion wanted a piece of the action.

#17 | Posted by matsop at 2013-03-06 01:30 PM |

He made an offer, but they thought he was lion.

#18 | Posted by kanrei at 2013-03-06 01:31 PM | Reply | Flag:

That was one heckuva climax.

#19 | Posted by matsop at 2013-03-06 01:32 PM | Reply | Flag:

Girl: Oh, honey do you love me?
Boy: Of course, and I'm not--- LION!!!!!

#20 | Posted by matsop at 2013-03-06 01:34 PM | Reply | Flag:

Girl: (looking at boy) Are you coming?
Boy: (looking at lion) Heck no, I'm going.

#21 | Posted by matsop at 2013-03-06 01:37 PM | Reply | Flag:

Girl: Your hair is so thick...its like a mane

Boy: Honey, I'm over here.

#22 | Posted by kanrei at 2013-03-06 01:40 PM | Reply | Flag:

Lions in love.

#23 | Posted by Zatoichi at 2013-03-06 01:48 PM | Reply | Flag:

This thread has no Pride =D

#24 | Posted by kanrei at 2013-03-06 01:48 PM | Reply | Flag:

Flag:

Lions in love.

#23 | Posted by Zatoichi

Stop posting pictures of gay lions.

#25 | Posted by TFDNihilist at 2013-03-07 10:45 AM | Reply | Flag:

Having sex in a bush can't be the most enjoyable experience. Spiders, ants and decaying leaves. What a turn on!

#11 | Posted by moder8

Maybe they are the type of people who like the rush of getting caught. If that was the case then they got what they wanted.

#26 | Posted by zack991 at 2013-03-07 03:34 PM | Reply | Flag:

Lions in love.

www.youtube.com

#27 | Posted by pragmatist at 2013-03-07 03:40 PM | Reply | Flag:

from the article -

......They had been having sex in a sideways position and he managed to escape wearing nothing but a condom.

Like it really matters now that she's been mauled to death by a lion what position she and her lover were in while having sex or that he wore a condom.

#28 | Posted by CalifChris at 2013-03-07 04:16 PM | Reply | Flag:

"I thought the female body had ways of preventing that."

That's true, but it can weeks to grow enough leg and armpit hair.

#29 | Posted by Diablo at 2013-03-07 10:41 PM | Reply | Flag:

At least he was wearing a condom. That in itself shows progress in that part of the world.

#30 | Posted by boaz at 2013-03-08 08:53 AM | Reply | Flag:

And BTW,

This does count as black folk being eaten by something, and I am assuming they are black...But not in the U.S.

#31 | Posted by boaz at 2013-03-08 08:54 AM | Reply | Flag:

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