Don't Watch Your Porn in Public | Drudge Retort

Thursday, November 12, 2009

Don't Watch Your Porn in Public

On a recent cross-country trip from Los Angeles, Jana Matthews thought she'd lucked out when her friendly seatmate cued up a cartoon on his laptop. Her four children were enthralled; she hoped listening in might keep them occupied. Then the cartoon characters started doing things that cartoon characters should not be doing. Naked things.

Posted by rcade at 08:54 AM | 34 COMMENTS | permalink | Comment on This Entry

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Joined 2003/04/04
Visited 2009/11/20

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I wonder if it was the cartoon with the stick people on the public toilet door. That's a funny one!

#1 | Posted by bellaspapa at 2009-11-12 09:15 AM | Reply | Flag:

I take it you're a connoisseur of animated porn?

#2 | Posted by valis at 2009-11-12 09:22 AM | Reply | Flag:

I take it you're a connoisseur of animated porn?

If you can get past all the tentacle stuff and Sailor Moon look-alikes the Japanese are doing some very interesting things in the field of cartoon porn.

...Or so Spud's heard.

...From a friend.

A friend of a friend, in fact!

Yeah, THAT'S the ticket!

Be Well.

#3 | Posted by dethspud at 2009-11-12 09:33 AM | Reply | Flag:

You're "friend" is most likely a child, and not really a "friend".

Seriously, is anyone the least bit surprised that the creepy fuck from canada watches "cartoon" porn? He probably wears footie jammies and eats a bowl of Captain Crunch while viewing.

#4 | Posted by 101Chairborne at 2009-11-12 09:38 AM | Reply | Flag:

He probably wears footie jammies and eats a bowl of Captain Crunch while viewing.

This isn't normal?

#5 | Posted by jpw at 2009-11-12 10:09 AM | Reply | Flag:

Don't link to porn here, please. Even cartoon porn.

#6 | Posted by rcade at 2009-11-12 10:16 AM | Reply | Flag:

FTA: "At some point . . . we've completely lost the ability to tell when it's socially appropriate and when it's not," says Matthews, the mother of four. At her last job, teaching at a university in Pennsylvania, "I don't think there was ever a time when I would do research at the library and someone wasn't using a public terminal to watch porn. I'm trying to do research and you're sitting there watching your . . . porn."

Hand up anyone who read this part and immediately thought about a certain poster here at the Tort ensconsed at the Barbara Bush public library.

Be honest now!

Fer the record Spud thinks Emily Post would shit puppies if someone got on a bus next to her and started watching "Nailin Palin".

Call it a hunch.

Be Well.

#7 | Posted by dethspud at 2009-11-12 10:52 AM | Reply | Flag:

I respect your right to watch whatever you like on your computer in privacy. I would hope that most people would refrain from masturbating at the Public Library while viewing their choice of stimulation. Probably the same might be said about Amtrak, buses, and airplanes. A charge of indecent exposure or committing an indecent act might not look too good on your resume. If minors can share your viewing, that opens up another world of problems. Your criminal record is public on the Intertubes, bucko.

#8 | Posted by john47 at 2009-11-12 11:10 AM | Reply | Flag:

Wonder who the 'toon porn guy was grooming; mom, or the kids. He needed to be thrown from whatever conveyance they were traveling in.

#9 | Posted by tjb357452 at 2009-11-12 11:21 AM | Reply | Flag:

If only religion was considered porn.

#10 | Posted by Manypaths at 2009-11-12 11:25 AM | Reply | Flag:

Viewing porn in a public or quasi-public place is not acceptable. Behind closed door that is quite another matter. In many states, viewing porn when minors may view it is a felony.

#11 | Posted by SLBronkowitz at 2009-11-12 11:40 AM | Reply | Flag:

#10 | Posted by Manypaths at 2009-11-12 11:25 AM | Reply | Flag: IF ONLY HYPOCRITICAL BIGOTS WERE CONSIDERED PORN.

#12 | Posted by boojiboy at 2009-11-12 11:49 AM | Reply | Flag:

Fer the record Spud thinks Emily Post would shit puppies if someone got on a bus next to her and started watching "Nailin Palin".

A few problems:

1. Emily Post would not ride a bus.

2. The movie deliberately misspelled Palin's name for obvious legal reasons. It's "Nailin' Paylin."

***

"Excuse me. Do you sell videotapes?"
"Yeah, what are you looking for?"
"Happy Scrappy Hero Pup."

www.youtube.com

#13 | Posted by snoofy at 2009-11-12 12:30 PM | Reply | Flag:

Reminds me of a funny story. I needed to put people into scenes for web banners and architectural renderings so I bought a copy of Poser 6 a few years back. There are dressed characters and undressed characters that come with the program. You can't put different clothes on a dressed character so you have to start out with a naked character prop which is quite well detailed. There is morph dials that let you enlarge or shrink the different body parts and the dials are very sensitive. The first day I tried to use program I was learning how the dials worked and blew the boobs up to watermelon size and then the hips up to horsey size. Just then my wife walked in who is rather petite and with one look said, "She looks ugly. Why did you make her like that? $200 and all you want is to make fatso porn?"

Porn, it's all in the mind of the beholder.

#14 | Posted by RingMaster at 2009-11-12 02:23 PM | Reply | Flag:

ringmaster said
"Porn, it's all in the mind of the beholder."

well, yes. it's ALL in the Mind.
porn is akin to men having sex with their own self or their inner woman. Its so widespread because men are very insecure (hence Machismo) and porn helps them think they're in control. though i don't know how in control you are when you're all alone with your pants down and a bunch of your own goo in your hands. but men try and tell themselves that is not the reality. but. it. is.

#15 | Posted by drudgery at 2009-11-12 02:50 PM | Reply | Flag:

well, yes. it's ALL in the Mind.
porn is akin to men having sex with their own self or their inner woman. Its so widespread because men are very insecure (hence Machismo) and porn helps them think they're in control. though i don't know how in control you are when you're all alone with your pants down and a bunch of your own goo in your hands. but men try and tell themselves that is not the reality. but. it. is.

#15 | Posted by drudgery at 2009-11-12 02:50 PM

Can speak for all men, but I just like boobies.

#16 | Posted by LIVE_OR_DIE at 2009-11-12 03:17 PM | Reply | Flag:

Can speak for all men, but I just like boobies.

Seconded.

Boobies are good!

^_^

Mmmmmm ...Booooobies!

Truly they are EPIC!

/That's art, dammit!
//In the "know wot i like" sense.

Be Well.

#17 | Posted by dethspud at 2009-11-12 05:56 PM | Reply | Flag:

I take it you're a connoisseur of animated porn?

#2 | Posted by valis at 2009-11-12 09:22 AM

I take it nobody ever writes to you? I was referring to a classic email attachment, it's probably at Youtube. It's comedy. If you never heard of it, your loss...

#18 | Posted by bellaspapa at 2009-11-12 06:15 PM | Reply | Flag:

How the stick figure people became extinct.

#19 | Posted by RastaCyborg at 2009-11-12 06:42 PM | Reply | Flag:

I don't think it's a big deal.

#20 | Posted by CobraSteel at 2009-11-12 08:39 PM | Reply | Flag:

Stick Porn!

Seriously though watching Porn in Public is definatly Rude!

#21 | Posted by Monstman at 2009-11-12 09:30 PM | Reply | Flag:

Seriously though watching Porn in Public is definatly Rude!

Posted by Monstman at 2009-11-12 09:30 PM | Reply

Yeah especially if You can't see the picture in it's entirity. THEN it's rude.

#22 | Posted by LarryMohr at 2009-11-12 09:39 PM | Reply | Flag:

"Especially when the (university) library was full, she was never quite sure how to deal with the situation. What's the etiquette here? Shoot the offender dirty looks? Drag in a defenseless librarian? Innocently ask the guy how much longer his studies would take?"

The librarian at my local university said it was the dude's constitutional right, despite that every place else in town says it constitutes sexual harassment. I asked her if she minded downloading how to build a bomb and she said "It's none of my business."

So the next time I see a porn-watcher in the library, I'm going to stand there and shout as loud as I can (while pointing) "Hey everybody, this guy's looking at porn!"

#23 | Posted by kirk at 2009-11-12 09:39 PM | Reply | Flag:

"So the next time I see a porn- watcher in the libeary, I'm going to stand there and shout as long as I can (while pointing) "Hey everyboday, this guy's looking at porn!"

Pffft..like THAT will embarrass BL2!

#24 | Posted by Lisa at 2009-11-12 09:48 PM | Reply | Flag:

I used to work at a public library as a teenager, filing away books and fixing up the computers. Great job.

Anyway, we had this 400 lbs guy with horrible acne that would come in and look at porn on our computers. One day he brought a kid with him,(his 10 y/o son) and I finally convinced my boss to say something, since smaller children of other parents were running around behind him and could see what he was viewing.

His response was "I'm of age". Seriously. Didn't want to see my boss or my city get sued (by one of the other parents) because this dipshit couldn't show his son an open vagina at home. WTF is wrong with people? Have some common decency and respect, folks. The library is not for watching hardcore porno movies.

#25 | Posted by Alexandrite at 2009-11-13 01:04 AM | Reply | Flag:

And no...I am not going to tell the library stories about the guys we caught pleasuring themselves.

Thank God I wasn't the janitor there.

#26 | Posted by Alexandrite at 2009-11-13 01:05 AM | Reply | Flag:

Lisa,
I'll report back when it happens...and it SHALL.

I'd put a car key through the computer monitor if I was the lady from the article.

I don't embarass and I have a very loud voice....and dudes who look at porn can get very ashamed...

#27 | Posted by kirk at 2009-11-13 01:21 AM | Reply | Flag:

I don't embarass and I have a very loud voice....and dudes who look at porn can get very ashamed...

Not me, my friend.

I look at things that would make Larry Flint blush.

#28 | Posted by RevDarko at 2009-11-13 02:06 AM | Reply | Flag:

Try editing it as your day job. Gets old real quick.

#29 | Posted by dutch46 at 2009-11-13 04:01 AM | Reply | Flag:

Try editing it as your day job. Gets old real quick.

Like folks who werk in a chocolate factory getting heartily sick of chocolate.

Try playing bad porn on fast foreward.

Gets funneh pretty quick.

Fer bonus points smoke a bowl of purple pineberry and put on Jame's Brown's "Time to Get Busy" also speeded up.

Farkin' hilarious.

Wot?

Just Spud there?

Be Well.

#30 | Posted by dethspud at 2009-11-13 06:35 AM | Reply | Flag:

I agree this guy "crossed a line" with his choice of entertainment. But so did mom when she settled her kids into prime viewing position.

Looking at someone's laptop over their shoulder is also quite rude.

#31 | Posted by Gargoyle at 2009-11-13 07:56 AM | Reply | Flag:

RevDarko said,

"Not me, my friend.
I look at things that would make Larry Flint blush."

Typical defensive and insecure response from a dude who wants to look cool and seem really in control but secretly has a super small weewee and cant get it up. yawn.

#32 | Posted by Drudgery at 2009-11-13 08:37 AM | Reply | Flag:

Then the cartoon characters started doing things that cartoon characters should not be doing. Naked things.

I wonder if those kids got their first glimpse of Japanese triple-penetration tentacle sex on that fateful flight. How do you have "the talk" after that?

"Well, when a squid and a woman fall in love..."

#33 | Posted by ZombieHunter at 2009-11-13 10:07 AM | Reply | Flag:

Don't drop the soap, Rev...the lad's kinda sweet on you. You see, mystery guest #32, The Gospel according to St. Carlin says that sometimes the cigar is a big black dick.

#34 | Posted by dutch46 at 2009-11-13 03:06 PM | Reply | Flag:

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