I thought this was going to be another Pat Boone thread.

Why are we helping these people? Everything we do backfires. Everything we do offends them. Just leave them alone. Leave them to their desert and camels.
They were ruled by the Taliban for a reason. If they didn't like it, they would have done something about it.

They're insulted because we gave them soccer balls? Fine, don't give them anything. Why the hell are my tax dollars paying for soccer balls to nutjob Afghans?

Are blasphemous balls anything like costume balls?

"The Prophet Muhammad was heard saying: 'The smallest reward for the people of paradise is an abode where there are 80,000 servants and 72 wives, over which stands a dome decorated with pearls, aquamarine, and ruby, as wide as the distance from Al-Jabiyah [a Damascus suburb] to Sana'a [Yemen]."

I remember playing Allahball all the time when I was a kid. Joe Acknadmuhulllah Doopeity Do Namath was my favorite player.

So when I die I get 72 virgins. The Christain Heaven sounds like everything will be sanitized and bright white. What if I make a mess in Heaven? Is it OK to be messy in Heaven or will I end up being transferred on the Hot Rails to Hell?

72 Virgins. Are they hotties? Do I get to handpick them or are they chosen? Can they all be from Southern California? Do I have to request this in advance before the bomb I have strapped around my body goes off in a market of civilians that have done nothing wrong, but good ol Allah wants dead anyway?

Will the 72 Virgins be open to threesomes? foursomes? will they let me tape them so that my buddies and I can plug in the x rated tape in the VCR after the big Allahball game and rejoice in the name of blowing myself up?

Are there bathrooms in Heaven and Allahland? What if I end up worshipping the wrong God? somebody is going to feel left out or be mad. Is Buddha waiting for me to rub his belly in the afterlife? Is Hell where the real party is at? Can I tour Buddha's joint, Hell, Heaven, Allahland, whoever the egyptians praised to, they had so many gods that everyone must get only a condo on their side, what about the Aboriginies and their God? do I get a mud hut to chill in in their afterlife? The Greeks had a bunch of God's too. A couple of chick Gods, which could be cool, but what if the chick God's PMS? Then heaven could turn into hell real fast!

Where do the toothfairy and easter bunny fit into all of this bullshit. What if I choose the wrong religion and the wrong God? Will their be a penalty? Cant all the Gods just get along?

I am confused. I am not sure that I want a religion with all of these things to sort out and choices.

I think I will just stick to forming my own kool aid drinking religion so that I can get on a UFO. That's sounds cool!

Dinosaurs on the Ark! Yeah, Bud! WHATEVER!

Good questions, Norm. I gotta say.

Did somebody say balls?

Sincerely,

G.W. Bush

It takes a lot of-well-balls-to put this out there....although-they don't have to be "Blasphemous"-to be effective......

What a buncha loverly koo-koo nuts ya got there-Afghanistan!

did it have anything to do with the pig-skin?

or was because the balls were the vinyl and lead ones from china?

This just in.......US helicopter drops load of goat heads for Afghan children to play with....everyone happy.

Well I'm upper upper class high society
God's gift to ballroom notoriety
And I always fill my ballroom
The event is never small
The social pages say I've got
The biggest balls of all

I've got big balls
I've got big balls
They're such big balls
And they're dirty big balls
And he's got big balls
And she's got big balls
(But we've got the biggest balls of them all)

...did it have anything to do with the pig-skin?

You might be onto sommat with that.

Hmmm ...why would a Muslim society which bans all pork products as unclean and considers it a major sin to reproduce the image of the prophet ever have problems with a "pigskin" with "Allah" written on it?

No, don't tell Spud.

It'll come to him eventually.

Be Well.

"A demonstration has been held in south- east Afghanistan accusing US troops of insulting Islam after they distributed footballs bearing the name of Allah."

It WAS blasphemy. Everybody knows the real god of football is Notre Dame!

Gee, my grandkids always have a rousing game of soccer with Jesus' name on the right after Baptist Sunday School.

Wait just a dog-damned minute here!

My balls have NEVER spoken-or written ANYTHING blaphemous! (Not that I-myself haven't....)
As it happens-my balls are very spiritual.

Every woman that's ever fondled or sucked on them has talked about it being a "Religious" experience!

Seriously though, what friggin' genius decided that this would be a good idea?

Saudi Arabia has complained to the World Cup's ruling body in the past about the use of its flag on footballs.

Sounds to me like some conman was stuck with a shitload of these balls and found the perfect sucker to buy them all.

"US helicopter drops load of goat heads for Afghan children to play with.."

Hey! I resemble that remark!

Very well said, Norm.

"The military must be culturally knowledgeable enough to thrive in an alien environment. Victory will be defined more in terms of capturing the psycho-cultural rather than the geographical high ground. Understanding and empathy will be important weapons of war."

MGEN Robert Scales (2006)

*If only someone were listening to him.

You know, I'm normally not a big advocate of these stories. They usually yield my response of, "Good grief! There's just no pleasing these people." That was until I read the WHOLE story and realized the root of the unintentional insult.

Essentially, it would be like having a Jesus punching bag and handing them out to Baptist families.

The soccer ball thing makes it so the kicker would have to be kicking a ball with something sacred to him on it. Let's be reasonable, eh?

Unintentional faux pas. Apologize, move on with life. Sheesh.

My only disgust is with these people who get pissed off about it. How about a little benefit of the doubt sometimes? Could these people stop and think MAYBE the Americans weren't trying to insult them? Just MAYBE? Good lord, get the f-ing chip off your damn shoulder!

Essentially, it would be like having a Jesus punching bag and handing them out to Baptist families.

Except that we don't have Jesus on our national flag.

Yet.

Islam is not a religion. Islam is a cult. A cult started by a murdering pedophile by the name of Mohammad, curse his name, as a way to make himself more important that God.

Islam is not a religion. Islam is a cult.
Mormonism is not a religion. Mormonism is a cult.
Judaism is not a religion. Judaism is a cult.
Christianity is not a religion. Christianity is a cult.
Buddhism is not a religion. Buddhism is a cult.
Hinduism is not a religion. Hinduism is a cult.

Now Pastafarianism, that's a religion.
Ramen




"Religion is all bunk."
-Edison

Wait a second, you're gonna quote the guy who invented the lightbulb as a philosophical source? Where's your brain?

Islam is a backward culture......maybe another thousand years and they will progress to the stone age.........

-------"Unfortunately," she added, "there was something on those footballs we didn't immediately understand to be offensive and we regret that as we do not want to offend." --------



How come there was no American flag on the footballs?

Of course they wanted to offend... testing to see what works and what doesn't.



----How about a little benefit of the doubt sometimes? Could these people stop and think MAYBE the Americans weren't trying to insult them? -----


They were trying to insult them. Nobody can be THIS stupid. Oh, they knew what they were doing.

Was there an American flag on the football or not? (soccer ball in Amreekan)

What genius is trying to make their own work harder? LOL

I thought the aim was to fool Afghans into thinking that Amreeka was their friend... not piss them off any further.

Soccer balls? How about dropping those animals something they need like soap, toilet paper, "tooth"-brush, or a fucking razor?

LMFAO