none of my sperm gets wasted

I'd like to lock this idiot in a room with an endless loop of bukkake videos playing.

Watching her melt down would be fun.

MTH, which idiot? Do you mean the one on the video-image? Or the SOBs approving such WOW crap?

I waste sperm about 3 or 4 times a day on average.

Reitze:

I mean Oklahoma Senator Constance Johnson, who does not seem to be able to find anything better to do with her legislative authority than this horseshit.

"I waste sperm about 3 or 4 times a day on average."

Continuing the family tradition, I see.

Continuing the family tradition, I see.
#6 | Posted by MaryTylerWhore at 2012-02-19 05:32 PM | Reply | Flag: Peed a little

lol, yea this sort of "law" isn't really law when it violates a women's person hood. Next the state will be eating for us too - after all most of us ARE a little fat.

Constance Johnson

HEy that was my name when I was in those 80's pornos!

I'd like to lock this idiot in a room with an endless loop of bukkake videos playing.

#2 | POSTED BY MARYTYLERWHORE

Maybe Iraqibukkake is looking for a new gig?

Continuing the family tradition, I see.

#6 | Posted by MaryTylerWhore at 2012-02-19 05:32 PM

.
maybe she should have called for an amendment to say that life begins the moment sperm is formed.......thereby making men mass murderers....
.

Seems like someone just proposed an amendment to point out the huge hypocrisy in the main bill. This kind of thing needs to be done every time some religious fudgepacking cocksucker proposes a bullshit bill to pander to his loony base. Add all kind of equally ridiculous amendments to the original to point fun at the pant-on-head asshat that wrote the original.

Vajihad

Watch what you say... Santorum might issue a "twatwa" against you.

"Santorum might issue a "twatwa" against you."

#13 | Posted by Dr_Icepick at 2012-02-19 07:16 PM | Reply | Flag: FF!!

twatwa = brilliant

I'd like to lock this idiot in a room with an endless loop of bukkake videos playing.

Who is to say he wouldn't like it?

You know the type - by day, they wail about the need to defend "traditional values". By night, they wail as two Mexican rent-boys take turns dicking them in the ass.

"Who rattled your cage?"

Puh-leeze.

Ya give people an opening like that, someone's gonna use it.

Or did the jailhouse showers teach you nothing?

Ya give people an opening like that, someone's gonna use it.

Or did the jailhouse showers teach you nothing?

#17 | Posted by MaryTylerWhore at 2012-02-19 07:45 PM

Fair enough.

The Bible says men are not supposed to waste sperm:

Then Judah said to Onan, "Go in to your brother's wife, and perform your duty as a brother-in-law to her, and raise up offspring for your brother." Onan knew that the offspring would not be his; so when he went in to his brother's wife, he wasted his seed on the ground in order not to give offspring to his brother. But what he did was displeasing in the sight of the LORD; so He took his life also.

Somebody has to do this...

Every Sperm is Sacred by Monty Python

#19 | Posted by BruceBanner at 2012-02-19 09:31 PM | Reply | Flag:

WRONG. That is not the point of the story. In regard to the context and setting of the story, Onan was responsible to provide a son on behalf of his brother and the family line due to his brothers death before a child was conceived. Since Onan was bound to provide a child and took the actions he did to spite his dead brother and not produce a child... that is why his actions were wrong.

I waste sperm about 3 or 4 times a day on average.

#4 | POSTED BY LIVE_OR_DIE AT 2012-02-19 05:22 PM

Your hand must cramp often.

Vajihad? Love it!

Your hand must cramp often.

#22 | Posted by glasshouse at 2012-02-20 11:10 AM

#19 | Posted by BruceBanner at 2012-02-19 09:31 PM | Reply | Flag:
WRONG. That is not the point of the story. In regard to the context and setting of the story, Onan was responsible to provide a son on behalf of his brother and the family line due to his brothers death before a child was conceived. Since Onan was bound to provide a child and took the actions he did to spite his dead brother and not produce a child... that is why his actions were wrong.
#21 | POSTED BY EXPSREDEMPTION AT 2012-02-20 09:50 AM | REPLY | FLAG:

I fucking LOVE when assholes tell me they know the context of the bible. GTFAC. Take GrandpaVernon and Pansy with you.

But what he did was displeasing in the sight of the LORD; so He took his life also.
#19 | Posted by BruceBanner at 2012-02-19 09:31 PM | Reply | Flag: IDIOT

Following your idiotic interpretation the bible says anyone who jerks off souls also commit suicide.

Not only is the rest of the story context, so is the fact that it was 2000 years ago and a different culture. And using that religious half-baked justification to inflict laws upon the gentiles based on that 1/2 baked interpretation of the bible for a religion... Your' pretty fucked up and trying to make the world as fucked up as you are.

fuck that. elevating sperm to the status of corporations is just WRONG!

Do understand that some recent pope - a Pius, I believe - based his three-wheel encyclical against controlling our numbers on a misreading of the Onan myth. Da Lawd smote Onan for disobeying Da Lawd, not for wasting his seed It's one of history's two greatest misreadings. The other says the Second Amendment gave all people (not just state militias) the right to own firearms. herm

#27 | Posted by somoco

FF!

I waste sperm about 3 or 4 times a day on average.

#4 | Posted by LIVE_OR_DIE

Reckless abandonment for sure...

It's not all Sacred nor is it all tasty.

"A lot of people thought that I was being facetious," Johnson told senators. "But I was serious as a heart attack. ... all we're asking for is for this conversation to include both individuals that are necessary to bring life about."

So she is trying to make smartass point but it doesn't quite fit. Sperm doesn't grow into a person. An unfertilized egg doesn't grow into a person. The 'life begins at conception' rule only applies to a fertilized egg. And it does affect both individuals involved, just not equally (not due to discrimination but due to the biological reality of our species). There is no way to pass any laws that are going to make men and women "equal" as far as the reproductive process goes. Women have all the burden before the kid is born and once the kid is born, they have all the rights.

all men have left is wanking off to their own inner woman. leave them be.

'... nor is it all tasty.'

Maybe not, but it's doable. Rather than say any other bodily fluid. Probably much more nutritious as well.

One of the most horrific aspects of these "Personhood Amendments" is the requirement of Law Enforcement to treat every miscarriage as a homicide. Unless medically unavoidable, a spontaneous abortion (miscarriage) will need to be investigated so thoroughly (i.e. diet, level of care, minute by minute activity of the mother, etc.) the police state required would be more oppressive than Nazi Germany or Stalinist Soviet Union. SSN's would need to be issued every time conception occurs and probably every time coitus occurs, (just in case). This of course eliminates all sense of privacy or doctor/patient confidentiality. The drug store would have to report on every single purchase and who bought what.
There is no end to the horrors that would be "justified" under a law like this. "...not even when medically necessary to save the life of the mother..." Mitt Romney et al...

Italics off!

Well I don't know about other guys sperm but my sperm is sacred and I urge Ashley Olsen to contact me ASAP for her anointment

Dark ages.

I keep saying it jokingly. But the GOP is heading America right back into the fucking dark ages.

They hate education.
They hate after school programs.
They hate science.
They hate sex.
They hate sexuality.
They think the Bible is actually messages from "G-D" (leaving the O out for those extra crazy enough to think there's a difference).
They think they are somehow special because they've all read the same book.

Bunch of fucking retards.

I keep saying it jokingly. But the GOP is heading America right back into the fucking dark ages.

They hate education.
They hate after school programs.
They hate science.
They hate sex.
They hate sexuality.
They think the Bible is actually messages from "G-D" (leaving the O out for those extra crazy enough to think there's a difference).
They think they are somehow special because they've all read the same book.

You forgot one
They HATE Women most of all
but...
They LOVE themselves...and of course, the sound of their own voices echoing back at them

if she spills a drop of my precious bodily fluids.

...a uh, a profound sense of fatigue... a feeling of emptiness followed. Luckily I was able to interpret these feelings correctly. Loss of essence. I can assure you it has not recurred.
~ExpsRetardation

I have seen sperm under a microscope. Some are double headed, some have more than three tails. Some show spastic behavior, while others are more docile.

This is not a smart law proposition. They say it's just a proclamation--no follow up laws to follow. Yeah right...

I am pro choice on the choose life side. But what happens for miscarriages? Book 'em?

But it is on the ballot in 12 states, 11 of which are swing states. Maybe more by election time.

The only reason this could possibly be on so many ballots is to rile up the evangelical types to vote.

My sperm are triple headed with four tails and carry Glocks. Any problems with that?

Cockglocking?

Dude...

The only reason this could possibly be on so many ballots is to rile up the evangelical types to vote.

Yes, you evangelical types are occasionally useful idiots around election time.

"But what happens for miscarriages? Book 'em?"

Fuck yeah! And every 28 days, police tape around every woman's vagina, just in case it's a murder scene.

Let's not screw around, Oklahoma. Let's give the vote to sperm right now so we can get on with America's REAL need. I refer, of course, to suffrage for the unconceived, whom today's constitution totally ignores. herm