Damn! I was hoping it was Merl Haggard. He is closer to God.

Did he make sure to make it okay to suck dick and take meth in the charter?

#2
That's the new body and blood. They dillute the meth in the wine.

The Church of Sendme Morem Oney Now.

Too easy. Meth-odist.

While I believe in forgiveness, this guy should really fade back for another year or two - he's still high on fame and fortune.

"People ask me what I think about that woman priest thing. What, a woman priest? Women priests. Great, great.

Now there's priests of both sexes I don't listen to. Ha, fuck, I don't care.

Have a hermaphrodite one. I don't fucking care.

Have one with three dicks and eight titties, I don't , I don't...

You know, have one with gills and a trunk. I just might go see that......"

WWBD

No Nanc...he's high on meth. Similar behavior, but for a totally different reason.

While I generally dislike these mega-preacher types,
after watching the HBO special on Haggard I really felt for this guy. He's obviously a flawed human being, but the way they shunned him from his own church was startling. I believe they somehow banned him from living in the state of Colorado.

So many of these born again Christians profess a love of Jesus, but display none of the compassion or forgiveness of the big guy. Is it my imagination or is it true that the more religious a person is the less tolerant, compassionate and understanding they are as well?

what's really going to be amazing is how many other losers will follow him and attend his church.

the more religious a person is the less tolerant, compassionate and understanding they are as well?

#9 | Posted by tiger150 at 2009-11-05 11:58 AM | Reply |

DING DING DING!!!!! We have a winner!

Tiger - he was not to preach in the area of his old church - not banned from Colorado.

True Christians are quite forgiving, but wish to see the change from his repentance. Go cheat on your spouse and tell us how long it takes before you're out of the doghouse and fully trusted again. One can be forgiven by people, but the forgiveness comes with a "price" for lack of a better term.

For instance, I can forgive you for a slander or slight you've made against me, but I will continue to be leery of your motives so will keep my guard up for a time.

You will know them by their fruity yet bovine flavor...no, wait...you will know them by...oh, that's not right either...

WWBD

Personally,

I prefer the one my friend and I finally decided on.

According to Wikipedia, as part of his severance package with the church, Haggard agreed to move out of the Colorado Springs area. This was one of the terms of his termination agreement.

Your correction is noted, Tiger.

The Church of the Ooozing Anus.

The Church of the Ooozing Anus.

#16 | Posted by jerrytarkanian at 2009-11-05 12:21 PM | Reply

Oooooh! Thign me up!
-Starvis

its amazing how everytime there's a post about gay R's, or in this case, Anal OOzing, Chairpoodle shows up.

Do you get email alerts from Rcade or what?

What's up cockgazer?(Ha blast form the past).

Church of the open back door.

simple question....when you think of christ....does your mind wander to this piece of shit?? didnt think so

#19, there's probably a sign out front that says: Please Use Rear Entrance.

Jesus said to befriend the weak, the halt and the lame.

He didn't say to send them money.

I was hoping it was Merl Haggard. He is closer to God.

Now that Johnny is gone, it's Merle on the right hand and Willie on the left.

Merle and I belong to the same church, and though I don't know him personally, neither of us would piss on Ted Haggard were he on fire.... and if we needed to take a leak.

More American Taliban

While I believe in forgiveness, this guy should really fade back for another year or two - he's still high on fame and fortune.

High on fame? Maybe... and probably enough meth to keep him chattering about Jesus and spiders in his brain until he can steal another 50-pack of sudafed and cook up more "redemption" in the church kitchen..

The Church of the Bended Knee.

Or how about something more esoteric...The Shiney and Bright Chapel.

All merriment aside, everyone deserves a second chance.

From the closet to the basement........

All merriment aside, everyone deserves a second chance.

And being a gay meth-head doesn't impede your ability to experience god. Enough meth, and you might actually become god. And then stroke out. Big loss there.

Haggard was a hateful fucker in his day... but we'll see how he reinvents himself.

And being a gay meth-head doesn't impede your ability to experience god.

Maybe not.....
But-when you're an rtard-and a Gay Meth-head-having spent most of your "Career" opposing Equal rights for those like yourself......and proposing and voting for stricter drug laws-to apply to everyone else but you?

What does THAT say about you?

Haggard was a hateful fucker in his day... but we'll see how he reinvents himself.

#29 | Posted by ZombieHunter

I doubt he'll "reinvent" anything..
He'll PRETEND he did-and his followers will believe him-send him money-let him Preach and pass judgment on others....

In a few years-he'll be back in the spotlight-having been caught in a similar Motel room-high on Meth-with another-(or even the SAME)-Male hooker.

Then, everyone to the left of flush rimjob will point and laugh at the loser and say "I TOLD YOU SO!"...

After all-a Meth addiction IS the hardest one to beat. It takes several hundred TONS of willpower every day-to avoid it, and the majority of people in the world-aren't that strong.

Merle and I belong to the same church, and though I don't know him personally, neither of us would piss on Ted Haggard were he on fire.... and if we needed to take a leak.

#24 | Posted by Corky at 2009-11-05 01:40 PM | Reply

Merle was buddies with the late Garner Ted Armstrong -- the televangelist who was "busted" for frequently screwing around as well as sexually assaulting a massage therapist.

Is this the church you are talking about?

God Loves You...and Donations!!!

Wondering:Is Haggard going to go public and sell stock on this very lucrative new scheme....er...religion? Boy I'd love to get in on the ground floor of what is guaranteed,in these stressed times,to be a major gold mine! Hallejuah for sheep and fleece!!!

Merle and I belong to the same church, and though I don't know him personally, neither of us would piss on Ted Haggard were he on fire.... and if we needed to take a leak.

#24 | Posted by Corky at 2009-11-05 01:40 PM | Reply | Flag: Flag: (Choose)
FunnyNewsworthyOffensiveAbusiv
e

Since you mentioned "church," I take it you are a Christian. If so, this is Christianity... this is the Spirit of Christ? Christ forgave people... he sought out the outcasts and the sinners of his time. Hopefully, Merle would "hate the sin but love the sinner."

I love the way religious assholes pretend to worship a man (jesus) and then do exactly the opposite of what he preached.

You know, surveys say that evangelicals have the best sex life...
.....#33 | Posted by Zarathustra

......Ted Haggard and Jim Baker were walking down the street, and walking in the opposite direction was young, good looking guy.

......Ted said "Let's fuck that guy" to Baker.....

......Baker said "...out of what ?".........

-Is this the church you are talking about?

Not hardly.

-Christ forgave people...

And what were his disciple told to do when their message was not heard?