Drudge Retort: Red Meat for Yellow Dogs
Thursday, July 16, 2009

A Maryland company under contract to the Pentagon is working on a steam-powered robot that would fuel itself by gobbling up whatever organic material it can find grass, wood, old furniture, even dead bodies.

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Zombie Robots??

Do you handle these, ZH? Better bring your "A" game...

Do you handle these, ZH? Better bring your "A" game...

The usual tricks certainly won't work... I'll have to get creative.

Awesome headline! Probably not a good idea to have an automated system "cleanse" a crime scene without supervision.

"Take to the air, zombie birdmen!"

Another thing to add to the list entitled: Nothing Good Will Come Of It.

Can I get one for my backyard?

It's turning into a jungle out there.

When does Skynet go online?

Another thing to add to the list entitled: Nothing Good Will Come Of It.

Yeah, it will be shitting all over the place

Can I get one for my backyard?

#6 | Posted by silver_ironist at 2009-07-15 08:51 PM | Reply | Flag: has dead bodies in his backyard

And everyone thought "The Matrix" was just Sci-Fi....

Going to have to re-think my anti-zombie arsenal...

"Upon the EATR platform, the Pentagon could build all sorts of things a transport, an ambulance, a communications center, even a mobile gunship."

Great...if you die on the way to the hospital your ambulance eats you and goes back for more.....Brainnnzzzz, Brainnnzzzz

The story at this link has now been revised to make clear it will not eat dead bodies...

Hmmm... I wonder why that happened?

He he heh

Do you handle these, ZH? Better bring your "A" game...

Well, right from the start you're going to have to put the Katana's in their sheaths. Perhaps store them in your bunker to save weight. The only time they'd come in handy is if the robots have exposed nerve systems (wires). Otherwise, you're going to beat your blades into plowshares before you kill the first 'bot.

If close-quarters combat is your bag, now might be the time to learn the soft spots of these things. Everything has a vulnerability. Low yield explosives to the midsection? There's gotta be an entrance for organic materials. I doubt they've mastered absorption through the metallic shell. Feed it a grenade.

Beyond that, titanium tipped arrows could provide some long-distance, stand-off weaponry but you wouldn't want to use those unless you had no other options.

Conventional weapons are always a choice for the well prepared zombie apocalypse survivor, given you have the ammunition. Unfortunately, because the robot zombies may not be hindered by the weight armoring materials, you might actually have to break out the big, $5+/round ammo.

I guess we can't trick it into trying to figure out the last digit of PI or something....

Could we send three armies of these robots to wipe out the axis of evil. Joshua in Jerico.

My cock is getting hard!

Magnets. Unless these things are TEMPEST shielded.

/didn't RTFA
//just came for a laugh
///leaves disappointed

"My cock is getting hard!"

Yup, there's a first time for everything.

"The story at this link has now been revised to make clear it will not eat dead bodies..."

Not without the adaptor kit.

Damnit! Doesn't eat corpses?! That ruins the entire thread!

Military Robots give FuckWit a woody?

Wow, talk about yer over-share.

Likee the killah robots eh, FW?

Sounds like progress to you?

Replacing flesh and blood soldiers with souless, uber-efficient killing machines that werk ceaselessly fer the government without an iota of remorse?

Wot could possibly go wrong?

Be Well.

I guess we can't trick it into trying to figure out the last digit of PI or something....

I've got this pain in my diodes all down my left side.

Foolish changeling! You thought we would take you for... PI?!

/nope, that just doesn't work

One possible glitch could be if the robots ran into Kirk and thought he was the creator. That flaw could be exploited and cause the robots to self destruct.

"Do you handle these, ZH? Better bring your "A" game..."

Well, right from the start you're going to have to put the Katana's in their sheaths. Perhaps store them in your bunker to save weight. The only time they'd come in handy is if the robots have exposed nerve systems (wires). Otherwise, you're going to beat your blades into plowshares before you kill the first 'bot.
If close-quarters combat is your bag, now might be the time to learn the soft spots of these things. Everything has a vulnerability. Low yield explosives to the midsection? There's gotta be an entrance for organic materials. I doubt they've mastered absorption through the metallic shell. Feed it a grenade.
Beyond that, titanium tipped arrows could provide some long-distance, stand-off weaponry but you wouldn't want to use those unless you had no other options.
Conventional weapons are always a choice for the well prepared zombie apocalypse survivor, given you have the ammunition. Unfortunately, because the robot zombies may not be hindered by the weight armoring materials, you might actually have to break out the big, $5+/round ammo.
#13 | Posted by Axiom at 2009-07-16 08:39 PM

Either exploding them or knocking holes through might be easy methods to forcefully counter a land-based robot assault if you lack underground facilities.

1. Offer an attainable target, like a prepared vehicle. Depending upon the intelligence it will continually "go for it". This buys time for:

2. Release a crowd to confuse targeting. Robots, rodents, birds or people - the zombiebots won't be able to get them all.

3. Bury the explosives - in this instance the strapped rodentbot or snakebot.

4. Detonate the rodentbots in their midst, or under their body. Targeted birdbot dive-bombing is also good if you lack trebuchets.

5. If all else fails - rail weaponry is simple to devise and nearly impossible to stop. Plus, there is no heat, radiation or explosion. Quiet, clean and precise. With a remote plane this would make even a rail pistol capable of delaying a tank.

6. Scavenge parts for second and third wave assaults.

7. Call them Duke boys for backup!

Aw Spud, ever the the pessimist, at least its ecologically efficient :)

.. Replacing flesh and blood soldiers with souless, uber-efficient killing machines that werk ceaselessly fer the government without an iota of remorse?
Wot could possibly go wrong?
Be Well.
#20 | Posted by dethspud at 2009-07-16 09:11 PM

That's what meth is used by the military for.

Good to have you back!

Surely, that's against the Geneva Convention?

does it shit stink? or are we just being had, again?

Speaking of dead robots, is anyone paying attention to Blinky McSotobot?

I.......do......not.....think.
.......wise latina women......have better.......judgement then........white men.......The.....comment..... ..fell flat.....

I........am........Blinky McSotobot........turn my ...........key......to make.....me speak and blink......

I can't really remember what my opinion on Roe V. Wade is.....

Gee..I thought it was only the civilian side of the federal government that feed on the dead and the dieing.

You guys are just angry because when the robot came through your town, it had one taste of you and spit you out.

Don't believe the article!

If this is ever deployed you bet your ass it will eat the dead.

Holy fuck this is some scary shit.

"A Maryland company under contract to the Pentagon is working on a steam-powered robot that would fuel itself by gobbling up whatever organic material it can find grass, wood, old furniture, even dead bodies."

Organic material? Dead bodies? What about live bodies?

#7 - When does Skynet go online?

It's been online for years now!

www.youtube.com

www.robots-dreams.com

www.botmag.com

blog.trossenrobotics.com

#33 SALARYMAN:

"If this is ever deployed you bet your ass it will eat the dead."

Puts a new spin on "No soldier left behind."

Great...if you die on the way to the hospital your ambulance eats you.

They'll be parked all over the battlefield waiting for their passengers to kick off...

#35 - R0B0T

Do I know you?

How does it know the difference between a dead body, and someone who is just sleeping?

How does it know the difference between a dead body, and someone who is just sleeping?

It doesn't.

So be sure and remember that next time you're camping outdoors and snoozing outside your tent in a sleeping bag.

Want some more scary sittin' around the campfire stories?

Yeah, but does it "Do the Freddy?"

www.youtube.com

Leave Constitutional politics out of a perfectly good zombie robot thread, please.

Gee..I thought it was only the civilian side of the federal government that feed on the dead and the dieing.

#31 | Posted by STIRSUMUP at 2009-07-17 05:50 AM | Reply | Flag: Never heard of a 300 dollar toilet seat.

Stir-the Pentagon has been feeding nicely for decades.

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