Drudge Retort: Red Meat for Yellow Dogs
Monday, June 01, 2009

That's right folks, I am officially a loser now.

Guess what I did today? (and it's not get my penis hung in the washing machine - that hasn't happened again for at least a week or two).

I GOT FIRED!!! Yee-Haaa.

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Lipzoidial

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In my mind, I think I will remember it as if I was a pure delicate flower trying to grow in a cess-pool of corruption and vile imaginations.



Gawd you're glutton for punishment..

wow, it amazing how much I don't give a shit!

"Maybe he wasn't too pleased when i told him to make whatever decision he wanted to, my 'give-a-shit-o-meter' was running on empty. Actually, in retrospect, I think I actually said, 'I don't give a flying fuck'."

Ya think?

Can't you just give the Masonic hand sign, and get a pass?
I guess you will just fall back on your previous profession, wearing a fez, and driving a tiny car in the parade?

Just kidding.... I'm sorry to hear you lost your job.


Gawd you're glutton for punishment..

#2 | Posted by Zap

Lol. Similar to what my wife said. Of course she's balled up in a ball over in the corner, biting her fingernails and chanting over and over, 'but i'm a good person, why, why, why meeeeee'....

She thinks I am too blase about the whole thing.

"She thinks I am too blase about the whole thing."

If manages the checkbook, pays the bills, buys the food, knows how much is in the bank and the larder, she just might have a point.


Soooo, I guess his wouldn't be a good time to inform you that your PT Cruiser is out of Warranty, your WalMart card was cancelled, and your Amazon order of Nancy Drew Mysteries has been back-ordered?

Nevermind, then.

Not to be coldhearted or anything lose ...er Lipzoidial but have they hired your replacement yet I need a job

how DOES one get fired from a walmart greeter position?

how DOES one get fired from a walmart greeter position?

#10 | Posted by nanc at 2009-06-01 04:31 PM | Reply |

I think they plan for a blowout sale and you get trampled like mashed potatoes.


how DOES one get fired from a walmart greeter position?

#10 | POSTED BY NANC AT 2009-06-01 04:31 PM | REPLY | FLAG:THE ONLY ONE HERE WHO COULD ANSWER

But, who is going to cook the fries now?


how DOES one get fired from a walmart greeter position?

#10 | Posted by nanc

'Welcome to Wal-Mart, Go Fuck Yourself'



Biological clean-up on aisle 3.

Sounds like you have landed on you feet Lipz!

And a vacation...

You sure time spent retorting didn't have anything to do with it?
Just kidding. Sorry to hear about it. Here's hoping you get that two weeks off. Its been two years since I had a vaca and I'm starting to decompensate, but I guess I may have jinxed myself doing japan and hawaii in the same year.

Lipzoidial

At first I thought it was you in the video since the face was blurred out. lol

So, did you deserve to get fired?

If you think your boss was just making up an excuse, then he maybe wanted to free up a position and give it to a friend of relative of his. Of course he'd never tell you that, but it wouldn't be the first time he happened to someone.

What kind of work did you do?

If I were you, I'd go down and collect unemployment. Supposedly if you're fired you can't collect unemployment -- which may be why he is trying to fire you, instead of laying you off -- but putting in a claim for unemployment would be a good way to contest that you think you were being fired for no valid reason.

You're boss might just let you collect it too -- especially if he fired you unfairly. Then you could get paid unemployment until your next job starts.

Don't take it too personally -- unless you were being a real jerk and deserved it. : )

I've been fired before. Walked out of the building by security even. It sucks, and it sticks with you for a while. Even though I got better jobs later, I would still occasionally dream about proving myself to the boss who fired me.

Sorry to hear that news, Lip. Don't let the bastards get you down.

"how DOES one get fired from a walmart greeter position?
#10 | Posted by nanc"


Don't worry, Nanc, I'm sure your special son will let you know how that happens.

I used to dream of sodomizing a female boss that once fired me. She looked real sexy too.


I used to dream of sodomizing a female boss that once fired me. She looked real sexy too.

#21 | Posted by rastaninja

And you are critical of others. How....stereotypical of you.

Now you are going to perform liposuction and apply lipstick to Lipizzaner stallions while listening to Lipa Schmeltzer.

www.youtube.com

Lip. I've been fired...on television...by the President of the unites States.

Did I mention that it was on television?

Lipzoidial --

Here ya go, you can have the last laugh!

"Take This Job and Shove It, I Ain't Workin' Here No More"

It doesn't count until they have the two buggest guys in the shop go through your personal stuff and "escort" you off of the premises. This feels like getting kicked in the balls as well as being fired. I was one of the two big guys escorting a coke freak out one day. He was still stupid enough to run off at the mouth. Weird day!

LIP

The only other guy I know who fits your mold was an arrogant POS who screamed at his boss . . . "You can't run this place without me!"

The next day they changed his access codes.

FIRED!


unless you were being a real jerk and deserved it. : )

#18 | Posted by CalifChris


Chrissy, I was being a jerk. I've found out in this world, everybody is a jerk, depending on your perspective and which side of an argument you find yourself.

People in management don't get hired and fired the same as non-management people. Any manager can be justifiably fired at any point in time, just by saying, 'It's not working out'. This is why you rarely find a manager with any apparent balls.

I did something that is very unusual these days, I stood on principal. If 'principal' doesn't have anything to do with the adopted mode of business, then you are running contrary to the plan, should you decide to side with it.

So, with that in mind, I've made a to-do list for today (some are lofty I know, but it's just a start);

1) Finally start that plan for world domination.

2) Start collecting naval lint - I'm making a blanket.

3) Sex-up the old lady to the point where she will puke if I even look at her in a 'come hither' way.

4) Paint little stick figures of everyone that pisses me off on rolling skins and 'burn' them.

5) Go on a job interview.

That should hold me over till lunchtime. This afternoons list;

6) Scale back that plan to over-sex the old lady, so I will try again. (I am projecting that I will be unsuccessful because I am old and tired and she is post-menopausal).

7) Scale back that World Domination plan a tad. Maybe I can conquer my garage instead.

8) Scale back that naval lint blanket plan. I may just make an afgan instead, or a nice naval lint throw pillow.

9) After burning all the 'papers with stick figures on them', I can't remember what else I was supposed to do.

10) Reflect again on how fortunate I am to be in the position I am in, and on how glad I am to be away from the weasels and lying liars.

Being an Ascetic is a cold and lonely road.

4) Paint little stick figures of everyone that pisses me off on rolling skins and 'burn' them.

5) Go on a job interview

Just burn 'em sans weed. Everyone is piss testing these days.


Did I mention that it was on television?

#24 | Posted by oldwhiskeysour

How did you get fired on TV? By the Prez?

Well that make two of us.

Got fired 20 years ago. Started my own business and never looked back.

I will be good and goddammed that I would ever let another dickhead control my destiny.

Lip,
Patco air traffic controller.
Aug 3, 1981.

Famous last words..."Dont worry, whats he gonna do, fire us all?"

Lol.

Lipz, I'm glad you have the principal to live on while you are making a stand on principle.

Not only fired us, but gave us the "you will never work in this country as a controller again" on the way out.

And so it goes.
And so it goes...lol

I hope you don't in one of those states that are having problems with funding unemployment...

otherwise, you might have to get some gubamint cheese.

Lip,

I didn't care if you had a job, I don't care if you don't have one.

This is a political forum. Just be humourous. If you want real sympathy call your family.

This is a political forum. Just be humourous. If you want real sympathy call your family.


No, DR is not just limited to politics. It's an "anything goes" forum. If a topic can be considered "newsworthy" (by any stretch of the imagination) or even just some life experience which most could relate to -- or have an opinion about -- then it gets posted on DR. That's why this place is more fun and has more variety than the standard "politics only" blogs.

I can't remember who it was, but someone used this forum in an effort to garner sympathy (and donations?) for some tragedy or another a few years back who was then accused of making the whole thing up but keeping the donations. Anyone remember that?

"I can't remember who it was, but someone used this forum in an effort to garner sympathy (and donations?) for some tragedy or another a few years back who was then accused of making the whole thing up but keeping the donations. Anyone remember that?

#38 | Posted by mOntecOre"

Larry and the SPCA.

WRONG that was Moomanfla and His supposed house fire

I can't remember who it was, but someone used this forum in an effort to garner sympathy (and donations?) for some tragedy or another a few years back who was then accused of making the whole thing up but keeping the donations. Anyone remember that?

Anyone remember that?

#38 | Posted by mOntecOre"


No, don't remember it. Guess it was before my time on here.

How'd they finally bust him? Didn't people on here get suspicious right off the bat when the guy started to ask for donations?

WRONG that was Moomanfla and His supposed house fire

#40 | Posted by LarryMohr at 2009-06-02 06:39 PM

Really, Larry, is that true?

Lying about having his house having had a fire and then keeping the donations from people on DR? I find it kind of hard to believe he would do something like that.

"WRONG that was Moomanfla and His supposed house fire

#40 | Posted by LarryMohr"

Goes to my point about not looking for compassion on the internet.

Well, Furio, Moonman got money from at least one or two Drudgers, so that kind of fucks your hypo. If I remember, TreesGoneWild was involved.

Talk to Lisa and Mike about that Christine. That's what they said.

CC - I don't think he outright asked for money. I think he posted his "poor me" message, and then people responded compassionately. I'm not sure about the details though, because I didn't give him money, etc. - including whether he really had a tragedy or not. I just remember there was a big controversy about it, whether he lied about it, etc.

CC - I don't think he outright asked for money. I think he posted his "poor me" message, and then people responded compassionately. I'm not sure about the details though, because I didn't give him money, etc. - including whether he really had a tragedy or not. I just remember there was a big controversy about it, whether he lied about it, etc.

#46 | Posted by mOntecOre at 2009-06-02 06:47 PM


Wow. Well, what did Moonmanfl say about it? Maybe OzarkAggie can fill us in on the details.

That's why it's best not to get too involved with people you don't really know -- especially online. I'd never accept a dime from anyone on here, no matter what problem I might have. Wouldn't ever borrow money or accept monetary gifts from those I know personally in real life either. Just have never believed in borrowing or accepting money from people.

Lipz, I find that weed gets me through times without money better than money gets me through times without weed ;)

www.seedboutique.com

Do it.

Well, Furio, Moonman got money from at least one or two Drudgers, so that kind of fucks your hypo. If I remember, TreesGoneWild was involved.

#44 | Posted by mOntecOre at 2009-06-02 06:45

Trees was nvolved too? In the house fire tale or was she one of the ones who donated money?

Looks like all the big intrigues on DR happened before I arrived.

Goes to my point about not looking for compassion on the internet.

Not for a minute do I think Lipzoidial put up this thread up than for any other reason then probably a need to "just talk" about what happened. Sometimes it's easier to talk about and/or get feedback from folks who aren't your personal family members or friends in real life. We all need to "just talk" sometimes when we could use a little boost.

"In the house fire tale or was she one of the ones who donated money?

#49 | Posted by CalifChris at 2009-06-02 07:03 PM"

My (vague) recollection is that she came down on him for fleecing some others, but again - I don't remember it well.

"Looks like all the big intrigues on DR happened before I arrived.

#49 | Posted by CalifChris at 2009-06-02 07:03 PM"


You shoulda seen it before the arrival of your Older White Southern Gentleman. It was a polite exchange of politcal viewpoints and pleasantries. (If you believe that, I have more stories for you.)

I agree with your #50.


If you want real sympathy call your family.

#36 | Posted by furio

What kind of asshole do you think I am Furio? Better yet, what kind are you?

I was actually hoping I could get some flame wars started or at the very least get some new insults. The old standard ones are getting a little worn from overuse.

No sir, this was just for comedy. Thus So, give me your best shot boys, since I am officially a loser now (I've never been fired before). Besides, I'm gonna have some extra time on my hands for the next few days.

Some people get it, some don't. I'll mark you down as one that just doesn't get it.

Better yet, what kind are you?

You don't even want to know. Furryhole is one of the angriest people on this blog. His issues run deep.

I'll mark you down as one that just doesn't get it.


#53 | Posted by Lipzoidial

Put him right below FrankF2.5's wife.

I've always hated being an employee. But there's a lot of businesses who want you to be an independent contractor and yet order you around as if you punch a clock.

I have contracts down pat, and I've researched employee law back to the point where the West Law category was Master-Servant. I've never forgot that definition.

The way I see this is that Lip finally got tired of kissing his bosses butt, and without the ass worship he was useless to the company, so he comes here and plays the bad boy.

No doubt he'll be back in a week reveling in how sweet his new boss smells when he bends over for a smooch.

I have to say Lip,it seems you live life how you present yourself on this blog.
Principle is such a bitch,it has gotten me in more trouble then I care to say.
Posting you got fired is a little over the top though,but what the fuck.
Fuck it.

rwd

The only other guy I know who fits your mold was an arrogant POS who screamed at his boss . . . "You can't run this place without me!" The next day they changed his access codes. -- #27 | Posted by Twinpac

This reminds me of an old roommate who gave her boss a piece of her mind after he publicly humiliated someone who didn't deserve it.

"You won't believe this," she told me. "I got called into HR and written up for telling my boss he was an asshole."

"Well," I asked her. "Did you?"

Annoyed by the question: "Yes, but he WAS an asshole."

No sir, this was just for comedy. Thus So, give me your best shot boys, since I am officially a loser now
#53 | Posted by Lipzoidial

Ok, here goes in my best New Yawk accent.

Looooooooooooooosssssseer yare a fuck'n
looooooooooooooosssssseer

That calls foar a beear.

rwd

I did something that is very unusual these days, I stood on principal. If 'principal' doesn't have anything to do with the adopted mode of business, then you are running contrary to the plan, should you decide to side with it. -- #28 | Posted by Lipzoidial

Congrats on the new job. Clashes over principles aren't easily resolved, and make for a lot of stress.

That calls foar a beear. -- #59 | Posted by rightwingdon

It does!

A virtual one on me: www.discoverahobby.com

#61 | Posted by Phoenix

Back at cha!

rwd

CHRIS

The DR incident about Mooman started when he came on line and talked about his house burning down. There wasn't anything phony about it, as some have suggested. I checked with the Red Cross in Atlanta on my way south that year just to make sure.

The problem started when LISA involved herself in Mooman's problem. Lisa, the ultimate do-gooder, set up an escrow account and solicited money from DR posters. I don't think this worked out very well, but her heart was in the right place, I'm sure. I have no idea if anybody sent money but if they did, it wasn't much.

For some reason Mooman (according to Lisa) didn't show the proper amount of appreciation and she got huffy about it and started to diss Mooman on the Retort.

The battle went back and forth for quite some time and the two of them ended up sort of hating each other.

Mooman did not ask for money. Lisa was the one doing all the asking. I got the impression that Mooman thought Lisa was sticking her nose a little too far into his business. Lisa, on the other hand, was expecting way too much recognition and got miffed when Mooman didn't measure up.

"You don't even want to know. Furryhole is one of the angriest people on this blog. His issues run deep.

#54 | Posted by goatman"

GoatTroll, this is exactly what born again recovering alcoholic say. You are one aren't you?

GoatTroll, this is exactly what born again recovering alcoholic say. You are one aren't you?

I'm whatever you want me to be, baby. But as I said in the previous post -- you and montetroll work out the details. "Recovering alcoholic" might not fit into the fantasy persona he's built for himself of me.


The way I see this is that Lip finally got tired of kissing his bosses butt, and without the ass worship he was useless to the company, so he comes here and plays the bad boy.

No doubt he'll be back in a week reveling in how sweet his new boss smells when he bends over for a smooch.

#56 | Posted by OzarkAggie

Nice. This is what I'm talking about. I probably agree with all that you say except the part about coming here playing the bad boy. The Ass worship part was dead on.

I just hope my new boss wears an agreeable cologne and washes his ass regularly. I hate kissing a dirty ass. But you have to pay for the 2.3 kids and wood-paneled station wagon somehow.

So, with that in mind, I've made a to-do list for today ....
3) Sex-up the old lady
...........#28 | Posted by Lipzoidial

.......good thing.........

.....cause now that you're home all day, the milkman and the pool cleaner won't be able to do it.......


....but seriously......

....what is your trade or occupation ?.......

Dude, just become a writer. Start with freelancing, then maybe put a book together. You probably got fired because you're an obnoxious prick (and apparently you don't disagree, LOL), but you're funny as hell. Write an article about being fired!


....what is your trade or occupation ?.......

#68 | Posted by skizziks

I'm an electrical engineer turned software engineer. I am/was/will be again the administrator of a top-shelf design software.


#66 | Posted by Lipzoidial

YOU HAVE A WOOD PANELED S/W?!?

wanna sell it?

software engineer
#70 | Posted by Lipzoidial

.......suggestion.......

.........while you are looking for work with a regular company.......

.....start up your own web-site-design company, a one-man operation, work from your home (or visit potential clients), get an ad in the Yellow Pages.....in most areas, the Yellow Pages cut-off is Sept or Oct, so don't dawdle....do NOT waste extra money on incorporating or even registering until you start making money.......you can charge between 1 and 2 thousand per site for each site.......aside from the Yellow Pages, make your own site as professional and attractive as possible.......

.....oddly enough...for all that people want representation on the web.....they still want a person to be able to talk to face to face when setting up........

......so if the new job does not materialize, there might be something there for you......

......whatever you do.....best of luck........

fyi - lipz - out of curiousity a few months ago i approached some web designers about what it would cost to reproduce a site like the retort - the average cost was between three and four thousand dollars. food for thought.

fyi - lipz - out of curiousity a few months ago i approached some web designers about what it would cost to reproduce a site like the retort - the average cost was between three and four thousand dollars. food for thought.

This isn't really an advanced design. I don't know what the back-end is, but even then you can find hosting on the cheap.

All that you need beyond hosting with the proper scripting, is the engine to run the site. That can be downloaded for free and tweaked to your liking.

The thing you won't have for free is promotion and visitors. You're gonna have to work to get people there.

Hey, speaking of back end, Lipz, found a job for ya:
www.upi.com

I've been fired by so many jobs that I didn't have one for 8 years. The very first day I went back to work again because I had to, the 35w bridge went down nearby & I had gone over it earlier in the day:>)

Life is good!

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