Stop the Blog-presses!

Hold page one!

Hey, Blog-god.

Get that BANNER HEADLINE ready!

This is the BIG ONE!

Archie finally popped the question to Veronica Lodge of all people.

A lot of people are kinda upset at this move saying that Betty is obviously a more natural fit fer the redheaded pereniel teenager.

Spud does not agree.

Spud thinks that Archie should marry VL wait fer her to get bored and drop him fer Reggie or sommat then split the marriage with all his ill-gotten pre-nupped gains.

/You know Mr Lodge would insist on a prenup.

Then he should marry Betty cos you know she'll have waited around fer him.

Best of both worlds sez Spud.

/Yes, waaaaaaaay to much time on me hands.
//Thanx fer noticing.

Be Well.

Archie, Betty, Veronica, Reggie, and Jughead -- all some of my favorite Archie comic book characters. I used to read the Archie comic books all the time. I think Archie wanted Veronica for her money. Betty was cuter but Veronica had the bucks -- the fancy house, the cars, the swimming pool.

Archie marrying for money in these uncertain times?

Betty was cuter but Veronica had the bucks

Truly she was Mary-Ann to Veronica's Ginger.

Spud would way rather take Betty and Mary Ann over Veronica and Ginger.

/Preferably at the saem time.

Still, this whole marriage business does seem kinda sudden.

They've only been dating fer wot? Fifty years or so?

Wonder why the big rush?...

zOMFG!!!!

Does this mean Veronica is preggers?

Hold the presses again.

We got scoop!

Be Well.

Bani -- nice to see you back around again.

Archie marrying for money in these uncertain times?

Meh, so he's become cynical.

Sign o' the times.

Even more interesting are the rumours that Jughead and Dilton Doilie are gonna come out of the closet and get gay-married.

Be Well.

Sugar Sugar

Betty was cuter but Veronica had the bucks

#2 | Posted by CalifChris

I would have boned either one of them.

rwd

I would have boned either one of them.

Well, yeah but wot if you could only pick one?

Also, Mary-Ann or Ginger?

Be Well.

I would have boned either one of them.

rwd

#8 | Posted by rightwingdon at 2009-05-28 11:11 PM

Just happy to hear your preference wasn't for Archie and Jughead. lol

Well, yeah but wot if you could only pick one?

Then let's ask him.

So RWD -- What's your preference? Blondes or brunettes?

#11 | Posted by CalifChris

Would that be a natural blond Chris?;)

To answer spuds question...drunk or sober.

rwd

Blonde

Brunettes sober.

Redheads and Blondes when I'm drunk.

Anything human with a vagina if I'm super-drunk.

Anything human with a vagina if I'm super-drunk.

#15 | Posted by ZombieHunter

All's ok until you wake up in the morning and pry an eye open.
Your face feels like a glazed doughnut and you run into the bathroom to vomit.
You check for tattoos and a tinfoil wedding band and hope when you wake her up she doesn't say those immortal words..."did you really mean it when you said you loved me"?

rwd

"All's ok until you wake up in the morning and pry an eye open."

I lost my right arm that way.

All's ok until you wake up in the morning and pry an eye open.

That's why I don't get super-drunk anymore. Or even drunk, really.

The "what was I thinking" hookups and hangovers were too much.

Would that be a natural blond Chris? ;)

rwd

Would you toss her out of bed if she wasn't? LOL

I doubt it.

I lost my right arm that way.

#17 | Posted by Danforth

damn! you type fast, too!

"All's ok until you wake up in the morning and pry an eye open."

I lost my right arm that way.

#17 | Posted by Danforth

Pffft! Child....I lost my virginity that way...

#21
you got two arms but only one virginity

"All's ok until you wake up in the morning and pry an eye open."

I lost my right arm that way.

#17 | Posted by Danforth

No paper bags laying around? LOL

A conventioneer gets plastered and wakes up the next morning laying next to a strange woman wearing a matching wedding band. After silently mouthing "shit!", he dresses and grabs his suitcase and golf bag.

While he's tiptoeing out the door, she wakes up and says "baby, we're on our honeymoon. Come back to bed and let's make love!".

His hungover mind whirling a 1000 miles an hour, he finally says, "Babe, I'm addicted to golf. I have to play every morning before I've even brushed my teeth. I'm sorry, honey, I should have been more honest with you".

She says, "Baby, that's okay. I should have been more honest with you too. See, I'm a hooker. I hope that's alright".

He pulls a 7 iron out of the golf bag, takes a stance, and says, "you just wanna turn your grip around a little like this".

Well granted that Archie Comics readership has seriously declined over the years, but I think this officially counts as having jumped the shark.

I lost my right arm that way.

#17 | Posted by Danforth

Coyote ugly.......well double coyote ugly is losing the other arm so she doesn't recognize ya.

I'd marry Betty-or Mary Jane.

Then fuck the other three on a regular basis.
Until I was caught.
Or died of exhaustion........

Wouldn't you get tired of hearing four girls asking "Is it in yet"?

Also, Mary-Ann or Ginger?

Be Well.

#9 | Posted by dethspud at 2009-05-28 11:15 PM |

To hell with those two lightweights, Mrs Howell would probably have been the nastiest kinkiest f*** out of the three. Smoldering I tell ya.

Archie pulled the trigger because Veronica swallows.

Betty on the other hand isn't quite into oral pleasure, she is a missionary only girl.

Definitely Ginger over Mary Ann here. There is simply no question. : ) But that's not a brunettes over blondes/redheads issue; it's brains (and personality) over air.

Forget Betty and Veronica. Archie should go after Midge.

Mrs. Howell was a well-known dominatrix in the Hamptons.

I never thought about Ginger, she seemed kind of slutty. I'm a Mary Ann kind of guy. She was raised around farm animals.

I never watched the Archies either. They came on right before the Monkees, which I never missed. Then Batman, then the Flintstones.

Damn, no wonder I only have 3 working brain cells left.

Mrs. Howell was a well-known dominatrix in the Hamptons.

#32 | Posted by LetUsPrey at 2009-05-29 11:11 AM | Reply |

Wonder if the safe word was "lovey"?

#28 - Looking for the EWWWWW flag. Guess an FF will have to do...

Now poor Betty will put on blue eye shadow and thigh high boots before getting blasted and trying out amateur night at the go-go bar. Thanks Archie! I always wanted to see Betty blossom.

Archie pulled the trigger because Veronica swallows.

Betty on the other hand isn't quite into oral pleasure, she is a missionary only girl.

#29 | Posted by oulosturmind

No Matter! What is the only food know to kill sexual desire in women????

Wedding Cake!

Arch is a player. He's still gonna tap that blond while living large on V's money.

Arch is a player. He's still gonna tap that blond while living large on V's money.

#38 | Posted by somoco

Archie was a pussy. He was just like that little twerp that drove the scooby dooby van, and hung out with that pretty girl.

And he always made the lesbian girl go off and search for the monster by herself, cause he would go off with the pretty girl and scoobie and shaggy would go off looking for sandwiches.

And what's with the dickey?

I think that guy was voted Prom Queen. The dickey helped push the voting over the top.

"""scoobie and shaggy would go off looking for sandwiches."""

Scooby snacks man:

im surprised that the author didnt want to kiss the gay nazi ass and have archie marry jugheard or reggie.

Oh, Girlfriends...please. There is some malicious snark floating around Riverdale that if you wanted to know what Reggie's dick tasted like, go kiss Archie.

I expect a quick annulment once Veronica gets a good look at all the sugar in Peter Pan's shoes and will probably take out her frustrations on all of us by incompetently dabbling in real estate. (Any one who has bought a house through an agent knows a Veronica). On the other hand, Betty is the the prototypical exercise gadget spokesmodel and will wind up doing infomercials with Chuck Norris hawking shoddily manufactured gizmos, by passively shaming all us fat people into believing we'll have really fabulous lives--if only we pampered consumers would realize the absolute necessity of having six-pack abs. In four easy payments.

Come to think of it...Jughead is the ShamWow guy. Extra points for the Midge reference upthread. Can you say, "size phreak?"

To tell you the truth, I had no idea the comic was still being produced.

#42 | Posted by afkabl2

Surprised, or disappointed?

You can feel free to be yourself here, Ish.

Man, I need to catch up. I didn't even know the Archie strip was still going.

What about Nancy.. did Sluggo ever marry her?

SA

you wont be able to draft me on your team..

goodness knows LARRY has tried enough.......LOL

What about Nancy.. did Sluggo ever marry her?

#45 | Posted by nmg_no

Why buy the cow when you get the milk for free?

Why buy the cow when you get the milk for free?

#47 | Posted by SanAntonioRogue

normally I would know this was just a metaphor but with you saying it.

well I dont know...............:)

Forget Betty and Veronica. Archie should go after Midge.

You kid, right?

Sure Midge was uber hawt and all but think this through if Archie actually tapped some of that Midge goodness then he'd soon be dealing with an enraged Moose.

Why buy the cow when you get the milk for free?

Ha! Spud has a female cousin who's been living with her boyfriend fer well over a decade who made a variation on that theme.

Tired of being asked when they were gonna tie the knot at weddings and such she started saying...

"Why buy the entire pig just to get a little sausage now and then?".

It worked.

Them people have stopped asking.

Be Well.

Also, Mary-Ann or Ginger?

Be Well.

#9 | Posted by dethspud

Mary-Ann most definitely.

Bailey Quarters, also.

Hold your horses guys. We haven't heard from Mr. Lodge yet.

Unless I missed "Archie - The college years," Mr. Lodge might not think too kindly about this . . . being an entrepreneurial typa guy himself and all that.

Archie will have to show some better stuff than what we've seen so far to impress Mr. Lodge.

Jus' sayin' . . . it ain't over for Betty yet.

/can you tell it's a weekend on the ol' DR?

Bailey Quarters, also.

Yum.

Spud quite concurs.

Be Well.

Bailey Quarters, also.

Speaking of also.

Original impetus there was say Spud's take her... "Town to town and up and down the dial" but then Spud decided the whole "concurs" thing was classier.

* considers *

Less crass anyways.

Be Well.

/Must sleep now, exiting DR as ya do
stage left.

file this thread under who gives a shit.