Pat Robertson does that shtick on his TV program.

First Class ticket to Heaven, $5000.

Nothing new here - just cynical, manipulative christians bilking other, more gullible christians, out of their money.

I recently copy-pasted this in another thread, but it's so damn good, it deserves to be posted again:

Religion easily has the best bullshit story of all time. Think about it. Religion has convinced people that there's an invisible man -- living in the sky -- who watches everything you do every minute of every day. And the invisible man has a list of ten specific things he doesn't want you to do. And if you do any of these things, He will send you to a special place, of burning and fire and smoke and torture and anguish for you to live forever, and suffer, and burn, and scream, 'til the end of time! But He loves you. He loves you. He loves you and he needs money! He always needs money! He's all-powerful, all-perfect, all-knowing, and all-wise, somehow just can't handle money! Religion takes in billions of dollars, they pay no taxes, and they always need a little more. Now, you talk about a good bullshit story. Holy Shit!

"When you sow for your financial anointing, the windows of heaven are going to open for you," he said. "... In the next nine months, you are going to experience more financial blessings than you've ever experienced in your life! 100 fold! Debt cancellation!"

IRL trolling at its best!

Seems like they're just taking a page from the Scientology playbook and putting a Christian spin on it.

Does this mean all my credit card debt WON'T be wiped out? i want my $900 back.

only in the "Fight Club" ending:>)

First Class ticket to Heaven, $5000.

How much is coach? Is it non-stop, or is there a layover in purgatory?

There is another money grabber on at 3;00am about 4 nights a week. He doesn't outright say give me money, rather he call for you to plant a "seed". When you plant a seed here, God releases his lock box in return.

This is disgusting to any Christian as it is simply an out right cash demand. God will in his own time, deal with this kind of person. These con-men are quite wealthy from poor people giving past when it hurts because God will return your "investment" and plenty more! God isn't in my understanding, in the banking business.

Nanc do you regret sending in 900 yet?

Nanc do you regret sending in 900 yet?

#10 | Posted by rastaninja at 2009-05-24 07:28 PM | Reply | Flag:

Nope!

The Retort prints yet another anti-Christian screed. Can the editor of this website find it in him/her/itself to find something good to say about Christians? Apparently not. A bigot.

Prosperity preachers suck teh ass.

The ultimate Ponzi scheme that's wot these guy are.

Remember you can't spell EVIL'S AGENT w/o EVANGELIST.

Render unto Caesar, ...biatch.

Be Well.

Diablo xtians are proven morons and deserve to be ridiculed

Boo-fucking-hoo.

The vast majority of the past 2000 years has been anti-everyone-else brought to us by the christians.

Now that that sad ideology is finally fading into the twilight, we are treated to the ululations of history's great oppressors, the horribly mistreated majority.

Christ.

Obama: Give Me Money and I will Take Care of You

Barack Hussein Obama II, a Charismatic and Deceptive Community Organizer who leverage empty feelgood propaganda to become the least qualified President in history, was able to accumulate more debt than all other preceding presidents in history in less that 100 days.

President Obama used a mixture of fear and falsehoods to fast track a 800 billion dollar economic stimulus package that was advertised to deal with a recession brought on by well intentioned yet economically disastrous liberal home ownership loans stemming from the Carter era Community Reinvestment Act.

While the stimulus plan was sold to the American People as a necessary tool to deal with the recession seen in 2009 the vast majority of the funds are not scheduled to be used until 2010 and later as a tool to prop up incumbent Democratic Senators, Representatives and Governors. No small amount of the 800 billion dollars will go towards old school Chicago political flavor cronyism feathering the beds of allies of the Democratic Party.

Earlier this week President Obama admitted he has effectively exhausted the financial resources of the nation he has governed for just over 100 days. In an effort to deflect blame President Obama blamed everyone and everything besides himself.

As of May 24th President Obama has overseen the bloating of the National Debt to just a shade under 11 trillion dollars. With an economic insight reminiscent of a 14 year old girl at a shopping mall President Obama has announced plans to collectivize the American Health Care System, The American Financial System and anything else that looks neat.

LOL

"Diablo xtians are proven morons and deserve to be ridiculed"

Enrico Fermi, Marconi, Thomas Aquinas, Albert the Great, John Paul II, Mother Teresa were all "morons"???
And you incorporate "Rasta" into your name here. My-my. An Ethiopian was divine? Hahahahaha!

The Retort prints yet another anti-Christian screed.

These guys and the idiots who send them money are anything but Christians. They worship Mammon.

As an atheist, I almost wish their was a God so these crooks would end up paying the price for their avarice. But there ain't, so they won't.

Obviously this "preacher" subscribes to the theory that if Gawd didn't intend his flock to be fleeced, he wouldn't have made them sheep.

This a**hole is as much a man of God as Robberson or any of the televangelists is, but then again they do intone "Let us prey". NONE of them is into religion to do good - they're in there to do well.

"There's a priest, a minister and a rabbi. They're out playing golf and they're trying to decide how much to give to charity.

So the priest says, we'll draw a circle on the ground, we'll throw the money way up in the air and whatever lands inside the circle, we give to charity.

The minister says "no", we'll draw a circle on the ground, throw the money way up in the air and whatever lands outside, that's what we give to charity.

The rabbi says "no, no, no", we'll throw the money way up in the air and whatever God wants, He keeps."

"The Retort prints yet another anti-Christian screed."

Yes, let's ignore another story of bald-faced criminal behaviour because it's "Christian".

"whatever God wants, He keeps."

#20 | Posted by LetUsPrey at 2009-05-24 08:37 PM | Reply | Flag: funny as hell!

I said this on other posts ...Ill say it again ...Televangelism has done more harm to American perception of Christianity along with Catholic pedofile priests than anything else i can think of. Jim Baker Jim Jones Jim Swaggart ...don't trust a preacher named Jim lol
Some sick and old people that cannot leave the house get something about TV church but not much else good is done mostly frauds and false prophets.
Darkstar

The Retort prints yet another anti-Christian screed.

Calling out a crooked televangelist is about as anti-Christian as criticizing Likud is anti-Semitic...

Can the editor of this website find it in him/her/itself to find something good to say about Christians?

You fundie bastards would have to do something good worth talking about first.

The run-of-the-mill Christian does small things to benefit others, and does not care about recognition. That is why they don't make the news very often. The bible-thumping pox on society known as fundamentalism emphasizes getting lots of attention for their cause... so Diablo shouldn't be surprised when the reaction from the media is negative. You fundie fucks give them all the material they need.

lol that Carlin post!! what a sad passing...

"I used to be Catholic"

Q: "What happened?"

A: "I gave it up for Lent"...

(Da da dum)...

But seriously, that's what happened...

as to being "anti-christian" as some have posted above when speaking about others I would presume...

I'm not "anti-christian", just like I'm not "anti-jew", or "anti-muslim" or "anti-religion" for
that matter...

I'm decisively "anti-bullshit" though...which is probably why I can no longer stand to go to church...

I'm decisively "anti-bullshit" though...which is probably why I can no longer stand to go to church...

I feel you on that one!

"I'm decisively "anti-bullshit" though...which is probably why I can no longer stand to go to church..."

I quit in 1966. A chick in the choir gang-banged the football team the night before. She treated me like shit. It just sucked on so many levels. People are so weird.

I quit in 1966.

I'm a little behind you... but I'm a little younger too ;)

I decided religion was bullshit for a few reasons... mainly the hypocricy of its leaders and their selective attention to scripture. On a more personal level, I think it was back in HS when a girl wanted me to do her in the ass because she'd still be a virgin and god wouldn't care. Don't ask me how this is supposed to make sense.

"because she'd still be a virgin"

*headdesk*

I need to go listen to Keith Jarret on my Amatis.

Send me your money or burn in hell forever you stupid inbred jackasses!

Enrico Fermi, Marconi, Thomas Aquinas, Albert the Great, John Paul II, Mother Teresa were all "morons"???

Of course there are good and intelligent christians. That doesn't preclude the existence of jackasses in the christian religion.

See the evangelical movement if you're confused. I've said it before - those fuckstains do society as much good as a swine flu sneeze on an international flight.

And you incorporate "Rasta" into your name here. My-my. An Ethiopian was divine? Hahahahaha!

Hmmm... the Rastafarians revere Haile Silase, who actually existed, while the Christians revere a mythical Jewish zombie who may or may not be a pipe dream concocted centuries after the fact.

Making fun of TV evangelists is a fun and time honored tradition for lots of people, me included, and this particular perversion of the Way is particulary obnoxious and ignorant.

But confusing them for people like CS Lewis or Reinhold Niebuhr or even G Morgan Campbell is quite another.

Or even confusing them with people like Andrew Flew.

"The Turning of an Atheist "

So???? Clinton and Bush said to America "Let me Fuck & Rape you repeatedly up the Asshole...till you completely Bleed out....and then...when you've gutlessly sold everything including your piece-of-shit soul...God will richly "Reward" you for your Fucking Brain_Dead "PATRIOTISM"!!!!

There are so many of them that I dispise. The one that irks Me to no end is Pastor Melissa Scott. The Harlot widow of the Late Dr Gene Scott. First She wears a collar and second She acts like She is the second coming of Christ. What utter poppycock.

Larry

Gene Scott ridiculed TV evangelists for 30 years, Larry, and would be as likely to punch you out as look at you if you called him one while he was alive.

His church, and Mrs Scott now, teach as close to the original Gospel as is found in America today.

No Jesus Junk, no alter calls, rarely public baptisms, no Prosperity Gospel, rarely even praying in public, and an intellectual classroom approach to what they teach.

If I thought you had a single clue about what you are talking about, I'd argue the point with you, but it's evident you don't.

Scott was a Stanford PhD and his wife reads, writes, and teaches in nearly two dozen current and ancient languages.

That's not in your league, Larry.

That doesn't preclude the existence of jackasses in the christian religion.

----

You find those in every walk of life. There are also thousands of cons out there.

Now forward this thread to 10 other people and rcade will give $1000 to first 100 people who forward it.

His church, and Mrs Scott now, teach as close to the original Gospel as is found in America today.

I don't know who Gene Scott is and perhaps my in-laws didn't either, but they maintained that Billy Graham was the only preacher of that genre who was not in it for the money, but to spread the gospel

This is deceptive.

If they are found to breaking the law--they will end up like Bakker.

----------

At least with the preacher--you have a choice to disregard.

As for Obama--we are on own--no choice.

Scott taught people not to send money unless it was to the person who taught them in the Way, which is what Paul taught.

In the stories Jesus is the one who overturns the money-changers tables at the Temple and condemns the most religious among them as hypocrites and fools.

Scott called TV evangelists, "Pussys for Jesus".

He was a colorful character, but a scholar, and a gentleman to those he respected.

As for Obama--we are on own--no choice.

#39 | Posted by MURPHY

Ya'll just wouldn't believe how humorous it is to me to see right wingers ridicule the likes of a man of faith like Obama while my Lefty friends hold their noses and cover their eyes and pretend he doesn't really believe in an Imaginary Man in the Sky.

Murphy-
re: As for Obama--we are on own--no choice.

#39 | Posted by MURPHY at 2009-05-25 12:11 AM | Reply | Flag:

No. We had an election (a choice), and you lost.

Bummer, but there was a choice.

No. We had an election (a choice), and you lost.

You were on the ballot, Murph?

For Corky. Melissa isn't as She claims to be.

Pastor Melissa Scott

Corky I don't think Gene Scott was a good example of a decent televangelist. Maybe cus he was older then the other ones he wasn't as outrightly bad. I saw him say once " hey these phones aint ringin so I'm gonna stop preachin til the phones ring again. and the for like 5-10 min he just sat at his desk silent ...then the phones finally started ringin and he began preachin again. His daughter has pretty hair though.Charles Stanley is/was a decent TV preacher and of course the original Billy Graham was/is decent.
Darkstar.

All priests are con men.

All priests are con men.

Why are there so many people so willing to shout their ignorance so boldly by wielding a broad brush and making such idiotic statements?

as to being "anti-christian" as some have posted above when speaking about others I would presume...

I'm not "anti-christian", just like I'm not "anti-jew", or "anti-muslim" or "anti-religion" for
that matter...

I'm decisively "anti-bullshit" though...which is probably why I can no longer stand to go to church...

#26 | Posted by earthmuse at 2009-05-24 09:41 PM | Reply | Flag: Flag: (Choose)
FunnyNewsworthyOffensiveAbusiv
e

I find myself in the same shoes often.

I'm almost certian that God does exist. I don't think I'm intelligent enough to beleive that all this just happened without some source of creative intelligence. (Maybe I'm wrong too)

One thing I'm sure of is this: I'm sick and tired of evangelicals (and others) who think the government has a moral obligation to cater to their crying asses.

WTF makes Xtians anymore correct than the next group?

My son graduated from High School last Friday night. As usual, we have our functions at the nearest church dressed with the christian flair, christian prayer and all.... What about others who don't beleive thia way? (public school that is, for any of you bible thumpers who feel the need to ask)

Taket, NanC, and the like..... Christians have had the same approach to conversion since the dark ages...

PUT 'EM ON A BOARD AND STRECH 'EM TILL THEY CONFESS!

why do these people want to be rich? getting rich in america is to be considered evil these days.

why do these people want to be rich? getting rich in america is to be considered evil these days.

#49 | Posted by semtex111 at 2009-05-25 07:43 AM | Reply | Flag: Flag: (Choose)
FunnyNewsworthyOffensiveAbusiv
e

Because they are sinful hell bats. LOL

Nahhh, really though, they are no different than the next guy... greedy self serving bitches who want a posh life style...

If nobody gave these people money they would become financial advisers, run late night infomercials telling people how they can make a fortune in real estate and household cleaning products or become Wall Street upper management. Up market or down market doesn't make much difference to them except in their ability to game the system and the amount of ill-gotten gains in play.

There's not much difference between believing God will send you untold riches or believing that you can get a consistent 20%-30% return on investment for ever. The problem is not so much with these scam artists who will always exist but rather with the unending supply of gullible and ignorant people who send them their money.

The people who give to these nutjobs are mindless.

But that's nothing compared to those who voted for Obungle, putting us now 11 trillion in debt.

Who's the real wolf in sheep's clothing?

I'll bite Theo. What do you propose as an alternative?

putting us now 11 trillion in debt

Guess who is resposible for 90% of that $11 trillion. That's right, Whimpy & Chimpy Bush and Beirut Bonzo. Thanks again to the party of fiscal responsiblity.

*responsible*

Nah Bush is responsible for 60% of the current debt. Clinton, Bush41, and Reagan are responsible for 25% and Obama and company responsible for 15% but Obama did his in first 100 days lol
Be well
Darkstar

"Obama and company responsible for 15%"

Obama's first budget hasn't begun. That starts October 1st, 2009.

"Gene Scott"

Now that was a kick-ass band.

"The horribly mistreated majority..."

Well, yes. From your tone, if you have anything at all to say about it.

"Who (Jesus) may or may not be a pipe dream created centuries after the fact...."

I guess you can call Him a pipe dream who was created. As a supporter of the 1st Amendment, I fight for your right to do so.

But to say this creation was "centuries after the fact" betrays a lazy sort of meaness, given I have to believe your history can't really be that execrably bad.

This is a forum for Democrats and many millions are Christians and believers of other faiths. You want to win elections you're going to have to keep us.

The atheist millenium is still itself a pipe dream. But perhaps like the current Republican party you'd rather be "pure" than successful?

"WTF makes Christians more correct than the next group...?"

You know the answer to that one. Christians think God came down and visited for a while and said a few things.

You can accept that or not, but there is no reason to get angry about it. Rumor has it there are times even atheists think they are absolutely 100% certain about things.

Relying, or course, upon a neurological system they see as being fatally flawed when anyone other than themselves attempts to use it.

This is a forum for Democrats and many millions are Christians and believers of other faiths. You want to win elections you're going to have to keep us.

I am not a democrat... a liberal on some issues, yes, but not a democrat. I have no need to keep any fundies around. I'd sooner keep jars of my own excrement in the pantry. Fundamentalism is a plague upon humanity.

"Obama and company responsible for 15%"
Obama's first budget hasn't begun. That starts October 1st, 2009.
Obama signed the 800billion stimulus debt spending bill aka Porculus. It was held over from before he was elected true ...but he signed it ...it is his. he should have vetoed it and asked that some pork be removed. But for some reason he needed it wrapped signed and delivered in 48 hours before anyone could read it fully
Darkstar

"WTF makes Christians more correct than the next group...?"

You know the answer to that one. Christians think God came down and visited for a while and said a few things.

Until they can prove it, they need to stow it. Spewing a bunch of sanctimonious drivel about your myth of choice makes you look like a moron unless you have something to back it up.

Rumor has it there are times even atheists think they are absolutely 100% certain about things.

They're not doing anybody much good either if they go about browbeating others with their beliefs a la Dawkins... now before you get your tits all up in a ruffle crying "hypocrasy", remember that the majority of "atheist ire" is mainly an effort to get the tendrils of organized religion out of government and the educational system. There's light-years of difference between that sort of thing and the aggressive proselytization of evangelical Christians.

"I have no need to keep any fundies around...."

One of my very best friends is an atheist of the highest intellectual order, made when I myself was an atheist.

I don't attend a fundamentalist church, But I can count friends who are Baptists, as one example.

I'm also liberal on most (not just some) issues, and a Democrat to boot.

I saw all above groups get together in November and do something good. And let's not forget my Muslim friends who also voted Democratic and agreed to hobnob with the infidels.

If we can get along, you can get along. No one cares where you store your shit.

"Until they can prove it, they need to stow it...."

ISN'T supporting the 1st Amendment. You did say you are a liberal. But I guess you also said just for SOME things.

The atheist millenium is still itself a pipe dream.

A more realistic one than a "Christian America"... all religions are losing ground in America, while the non-religious are gaining ground. Evangelicals have managed to avoid significant losses and may be growing in numbers despite a general decline in the public's commitment to Christianity.

We're headed toward a polarized future. One camp will not give a crap about what some dude in a robe has to say about sky-men. The other will probably try to storm the embassy of a godless european country and take hostages...

But perhaps like the current Republican party you'd rather be "pure" than successful?

I certainly hope both parties pursue their idiotic notions of "purity". Both need to go the way of the dinosaurs...

"The aggressive protesylization of evangelical Christians..."

I had a smilingly demure young woman and her very young daughter come to my door just yesterday and want to talk God.

Aggressive? Lions and tigers and bears....

"The non-religous are gaining ground..."

Honey, the "non-religous" have always been a majority in this country. That's nothing to brag about. I know a lot of those people, too.

"We're headed towards a polarized future..."

With your help. Personally, the odd Mormon biking up to my doorstep is never going to offend or frighten me.

ISN'T supporting the 1st Amendment

I'm not saying that the government should silence them (fundies). People with common sense should realize the threat that they pose to our society and take it upon themselves to ridicule them into ignominity. Just as they would a racist or a homophobe. That is consistent with the 1st amendment.

I have no problem with people who want to talk about their beliefs. Presenting them as if they are the only valid set of beliefs (with the implication that those who disagree deserve eternal damnation) is loathsome. I find very little of Christian scripture objectionable... the parts I find loathsome are the ones that profess hatred. Unfortunately, those are the parts that a lot of churches obsess over.

"Take it upon themselves to ridicule themn into ignominity...."

I'm at a loss to explain you.

I suppose it is consistent with the 1st Amendment. It's just that it's not consistent with ordinary human decency. "Decency" being one of those principles you can just work out logically....

I'm reminded of the tiff between the beauty queen and Perez Hilton. From your point of view, Hilton behaved correctly. Brave new world.

You know, I live with Baptists all around me. They are less annoying than you are and as far as I can tell all much less of a threat to me than conditions you would allow to develop among persons of "common sense".

"We are headed toward a polarized future"
-ZH

With your help.
-Zed

It takes two to tango, and people like you are willing to partner with just about anyone.

Personally, the odd Mormon biking up to my doorstep is never going to offend or frighten me.

I find them quite annoying, as I do all solicitors. The religious ones are especially bad, though, since they're pushy. Joseph Smith and the creators of mormonism were smart... they created a religion that obliged its followers to breed like bacteria and aggressively proselytize. He knew how to make a new religious movement stick around.

Anyway politely ask them to leave, and if they don't, I tell them precisely why I think their beliefs are retarded. If they still don't leave, I them that I'm going to get my car antenna. No one has stuck around after that point... they don't want to die.

I'm reminded of the tiff between the beauty queen and Perez Hilton. From your point of view, Hilton behaved correctly. Brave new world.

lol, right.

From my point of view, a gay man has no business judging a beauty pageant. You need a panel of a dozen good old boys with a large cooler full of beer. Make sure the panel is balanced between boob guys, ass guys, and a few freaks.

Perez Hilton is an ass, for many reasons beyond the competition.

I disagree with Miss Cali, but she is not an ass unless she tries to foist her beliefs off on others or restrict their right to pursue happiness for themselves (since what gay people do doesn't really impact her fine straight ass).

Why are there so many people so willing to shout their ignorance so boldly by wielding a broad brush and making such idiotic statements?

--------

You are the idiot goatbrain.

All priests are con men.

Their argument comes down to: lie to the stupid fucking cows so that they will all move in the same direction. It's better that way.

"People like you are willing to partner with just about anyone..."

God knows I have my share of faults. One of them isn't wishing for a world where there's no room for people like you.

"I tell them I'm going to get my car attenna..."

I've been alive many decades now. All the ones I've met leave smiling as soon as I say "no". I've never had to contemplate killing anyone.

I suppose it is consistent with the 1st Amendment. It's just that it's not consistent with ordinary human decency. "Decency" being one of those principles you can just work out logically....

I suppose it would be decent of the holier-than-thou Christians to stop using their religion as an excuse to tell other people how to live their lives.

It would be decent of them to acknowledge the validity of scientific method in describing the physical world.

It also might be somewhat decent if they would admit that there is nothing wrong with followers of other religions (or no religion) since no Christian can prove any of their mythological mumbo-jumbo about the exclusive validity of their beliefs.

Oh, yeah, it would be decent of them to ditch their pathetic self-righteous bitching when judges rule that Christianity has sunk its claws too far into this secular nation.

God knows I have my share of faults. One of them isn't wishing for a world where there's no room for people like you.

I'm sure you're aware that the feeling is mutual...

God knows I have my share of faults. One of them isn't wishing for a world where there's no room for people like you.

#78 | Posted by Zed at 2009-05-25 01:04 PM | Reply | Flag: Something "jesus" would've likely said, if he'd actually existed. Yup.

How much is coach? Is it non-stop, or is there a layover in purgatory? - Goatman

Goatman- the only official "purgatory" is now situated in airports, didn't you notice?

Praise be to the Sun God, Ra!

For, in the absence of His Heliocentric Halo of Holiness, the crops would not grow, the girls wouldn't have an excuse to walk around in their skimpy summer clothes, and the ancients would've been floss for some large predatory cat.

I've got some big news, guys.

I'm bringing back Worship of the Sun God, Ra! He came to me in a vision last night (well, first thing this morning, actually!) and stated that He wants me to drive a convertible Ferrari so that we may forge a closer relationship.

I'll be setting up a Paypal account and taking tax-free donations.

Stay tuned for more details...

Ra! Ra! Ra! That's the spirit we have at More Science High.

"It would be decent if they'd (Christians) admit the valdity of the scientific method in describing the physical world...."

We have no problem describing things. It's just the things we think are important to describe, science isn't competent to.

Appreciation for science is most often based on what scientists themselves consider non-rational perceptions and motivations.

Dawkins is not the first I've seen wrestle with this. "Awe" seems a guilty pleasure for these men. They're in love but they (think they) know love breaks down to mundane chemicals and stimuli they demean when it's someone besides a scientist that has the experience.

To be honest, they seem to think it's alright to have a (scientific) experience beyond the data and beyond "proof" if you also concede you are being a bit silly about it.

There is no "romance" in the universe if you are a materialist. No place for it. A myth and an abstraction. That the majority of men are materialists (practical atheists) probably accounts for the fact we haven't been back to the Moon in half-a-century.

I've absolutely no problem with America being a secular nation. It's just that "secular" can be a very broad term.

"Materialists" have been spoiled because Judeo-Christian philosophy has spawned the very tolerance that permits them to exist. They forgotten they are goldfish, and forgotten the nature of water.

Many people (including atheists) have an image of what a good person is because, push-comes-to-shove, the Bible put it there.

The first generation of true free-thinkers may reason themselves into a place where "good" is something radically different than taken for granted today.

Let's hope a loyal opposition is permitted at that time. You guys might need us.

We have no problem describing things.

Physical things? I'd think not. You've got singularities at the crucifixtion, geocentric astronomy, and an I'm-not-a-damn-monkey understanding of biology.

Spiritual things? The mystics of damn near any religion on earth would beg to differ... they seem to have great difficulty. Their valiant efforts are what makes them worth reading.

Your "god" is the petty, vindictive cunt who we have all dated at some point. Your "god"
has been hideously warped by centuries of entanglement with human politics. The god of a mystic is something far broader... something beautiful.

It's just the things we think are important to describe, science isn't competent to.

Hmmm... I wonder how much of what you take for granted has been produced by a bunch of robed dolts sitting around in a circle and thinking about something for which there is no evidence.

Science is practical, and it gives humanity things that can be applied. Spirituality is amorphous, and it gives us things to exercise our right brains with. I'll certainly admit that contemplating the "spiritual" issues is enriching and a part of the human experience. It isn't something to flip your lid over, though.

Many people (including atheists) have an image of what a good person is because, push-comes-to-shove, the Bible put it there.

And I'm sure that the other religions and philosophies of the world had nothing to do with it. Yep. Absolutely nothing.

Moron.

There is no "romance" in the universe if you are a materialist.

Why does it need mystique? To make you feel comfortable living in it?

Get over your own insecurities.

Many people (including atheists) have an image of what a good person is because, push-comes-to-shove, the Bible put it there.

#87 | Posted by Zed at 2009-05-25 02:13 PM | Reply | Flag: Bullshit Flag!

The above is what's known as a Non causa pro causa fallacy, or the false cause fallacy.

You argue that the 10 Commandments are the source of modern morality, and all that's good; I, however, argue that the 10 Commandments are the combined effects of the forces of evolution (if we all went around killing one another, stealing, etc., we simply wouldn't be here today) and mindful efforts at social control (that spooky bit about worshipping false gawds, or whatever).

Just because it is one of the earlier and most historically significant codification of laws doesn't mean many of these ideas weren't already in practice beforehand.

But, leave it to a gullible christian to thump their chest and claim all of the benefits while ignoring all the harm done...

How is this different than giving Al Gore your money?

Al gets richer and you feel better about yourself.

And none of that changes anything.

#92 | Posted by BENDOR

Nice attempted deflection.

I think Al Gore is a hypocrite and in the business for selfish reasons, but at least he's not been pillaging the earth for the last two millennia.

This is a prime example why Evangelicals need to stop calling themselves "Christians." You are not. You are who Jesus expelled from the Temple... Now get out and go away. Join scientology, that is closer to your beliefs...and profile. Wait, let me let you play with rattle snakes and speak in toungs while dancing a jig... OK, feel better now? Then send me $200 and I'll make you rich too.

Kind of a gossip, aren't you there, Larry?

As Saul, Paul killed Christians. If he could be forgiven, there should be no exceptions as to who else can be.

man there are some angry people on this thread...
(makes the sign of the cross to ward off evil)

and I'm more of an Agnostic than a believer...

fyi...just saw Angels & Demons movie at the theater,
and found it "Profoundly Spiritual and Moving"...

take that all you Fundyzealotshypocrits...

(grins sheepishly)...Gods but that is fun to say.

"Are the combined effects of evolution...."

Nothing more sad than a "scientific" idea with experimental, or any, validation.

Am aware of this idea, of course. It's most immediate implication is that God and, strangely enough following your own argument, the Bible, represent normative concepts and culture from an evolutionary point of view.

This being true, atheists must assert an atheist gene--One that's adaptive, of course---Or else agree not to breed for fear of compromising future human survival.

You are the idiot goatbrain.

All priests are con men.

No they are not. I am an atheist and I still recognize the severe error in your statement.

You beg the question, of course. Regardless if Christian ideals have a biological basis, the modern Western "liberal" concept of what makes a good person comes concretely from Christians.

That includes, for one specific example, fundamental modern notions of fair play. I guess you could argue against that, or any of the above, but only if your history be very fuzzy, and only if you want to attract ridicule.

I've described cultures that have a different view on "good" than this one. They aren't hard to find. One assumes they have a gene for that, too.

What you're doing is creating a box where there is no good or bad, really. Just genes to one's taste. An evil and silly idea, but one that's entirely necessary from a certain termite---Er, human--Perspective.

I think Al Gore is a hypocrite and in the business for selfish reasons, but at least he's not been pillaging the earth for the last two millennia.

#93 | Posted by Zarathustra

Really?

The man owns five mansions - all of them 30,000 feat or more.

He flies around in private jets and rides in armor-plated SUVs.

Al Gore's total water and electric bills are a hundred times more than the average citizens.

I find it odd that folks like you give Al Gore pass on his own huge carbon footprint.

Religion is Religion - the actual godhead notwithstanding.

Is it fair to assume you're one of Al Gore's disciples?

WHUPS---

Nothing more sad than a scientific idea without experimental, or any, validation.

That's pretty damned true. Scientific gossip in place of scientific fact. And who is sleeping with whom in the world of science? Inquiring minds want to know.

Having often been instructed not to speak of things I can't prove, I'm tempted to offer the same advice. That might limit your conversation to ten minutes per day.

"Your God is a petty, vindictive cunt..."

Too bad your mama hadn't the gene for washing your mouth out with soap, you very bad little boy.

#100 | Posted by BENDOR

What about my #93 even allows for the possibility that it is "fair to assume [I'm] one of Al Gore's disciples?"

I think Al Gore is a hypocrite and in the business for selfish reasons, but at least he's not been pillaging the earth for the last two millennia.

YOU brought up Al Gore. Acknowledging that he's a hypocrite, I simply stated that at least he's not been on a rampage for the last 2000 years.

What, do you want a dissertation on why I think he's full of it?

Reading is fundamental.

Is it fair to assume you were dropped on your head as a child?

"Why does anyone need mystique...?"

Well, to follow current theme, perhaps there's a gene for it? One you lack?

Many, many scientists state they do what they do for the "mystique", or "romance". We can assume some would cease being scientists and take up pig farming if that weren't there for them.

"Godliness with contentment is great gain.... For the love of money is a root of all kinds of evil.... But you, MAN OF GOD, flee from all this..." (1 Timothy 6:6-11).

"I have not coveted anyone's silver or gold clothing..." (Acts 20:33).

"One you lack?"

That's evolution for you. Shedding the unnecessary.

"Shedding the unnecessary..."

Makes one wonder why he's not a one-celled organism of some sort, doesn't it?

Well, to follow current theme, perhaps there's a gene for it? One you lack?

Genes and the environment combine to create the person who you are. So, blame them both if you want to be accurate... but accuracy in scientific matters has never been your forte.

Many, many scientists state they do what they do for the "mystique", or "romance". We can assume some would cease being scientists and take up pig farming if that weren't there for them.

There is certainly an allure to doing something that has never been done before, or expanding the fronteirs of human knowledge. Most scientists will also tell you that it's a long process, full of long, monontonous days, frustration, and more than a bit of drudge work.

Still, what you are talking about here is fundamentally different from assigning some sort of special meaning to the universe. You're equating the allure of a career to some transcendant meaning of the universe... right...

"...I have come to believe that the whole world is an enigma, a harmless enigma that is made terrible by our own mad attempt to interpret it as though it had an underlying truth."
-Umberto Eco

"You're equating the alure of career to some transcendentant meaning of the universe..."

No.

"Makes one wonder why he's not a one-celled organism of some sort, doesn't it?

#107 | Posted by Zed at 2009-05-25 06:57 PM | Reply | Flag: "

Have much use for YOUR appendix?

#10 | Posted by rastaninja

prosperity preachers are the scourge of people of faith.

i'd rather take $900 and burn it than send it to a prosperity preacher - they are going to pay dearly for their lack of caring for the truly poor. God help them.

#26 | Posted by earthmuse

cut the crappe.

A song for ... ??

Nance-
re: they are going to pay dearly for their lack of caring for the truly poor.

In the afterlife, I assume.

Antonioni, best of all ...

#114 | Posted by BetelG

narrow is the gate, betelg. not as many who THINK they're passing through it will.

narrow is the gate, betelg. not as many who THINK they're passing through it will.

#117 | Posted by nanc

SO true.

The man owns five mansions - all of them 30,000 feat or more.

LOL---LINK? feat?

He flies around in private jets and rides in armor-plated SUVs.

Who would want to ride with a possible putz like you as a seatmate if given the chance? Who would take a chance in a regular SUVs with nut cases like you around? Conservatives are proven assassins. I don't recall any conservatives who have been assassinated. The SUV is for self protection.

Al Gore's total water and electric bills are a hundred times more than the average citizens.

Al Gore Greened up his mansion. What a surprise you are still spewing the same old bullshit.

narrow is the gate, betelg. not as many who THINK they're passing through it will.

#117 | Posted by nanc

You certainly will not

narrow is the gate, betelg. not as many who THINK they're passing through it will.

#117 | Posted by nanc at 2009-05-26 10:23 AM | Reply | Flag: IRONY

What about my #93 even allows for the possibility that it is "fair to assume [I'm] one of Al Gore's disciples?"

I think Al Gore is a hypocrite and in the business for selfish reasons, but at least he's not been pillaging the earth for the last two millennia.

YOU brought up Al Gore. Acknowledging that he's a hypocrite, I simply stated that at least he's not been on a rampage for the last 2000 years.

What, do you want a dissertation on why I think he's full of it?

Reading is fundamental.

Is it fair to assume you were dropped on your head as a child?

#103 | Posted by Zarathustra

Not rampaging the Earth?

Al Gore uses more of the earth's natural resources than you, me, and one hundred other people put together.

If Al Gore isn't "rampaging the earth", who is?

Just like your average hypocritical TV evangelist, Al Gore is the do-as-I-say-not-as-I-do, lead preacher in the new religion of Climate Change.

And if you "believe" in man-caused climate change, you're one of his disciples.

The weak-minded get what they deserve.

Aggressive? Aggressive? Aggressive? Lions and tigers and bears....

#68 | Posted by Zed at 2009-05-25 12:43 PM

I don't think Zombie was so much worried about the sweet little girls coming to your door...(which is another con artist trick BTW)

I think we are all a bit more worried about the End of Times Philosophy of the Evangelicals...which is very aggressive indeed. Many have already died because of this "belief system".

Tax the churches . . . tax the property that belongs to churches. - Frank Zappa

This is pretty much off-topic. But, the "God Hates Fags" losers are protesting right outside my office right now. There is a funeral for a soldier going on a block away. I hate these assholes.

This is pretty much off-topic. But, the "God Hates Fags" losers are protesting right outside my office right now. There is a funeral for a soldier going on a block away. I hate these assholes.

#126 | Posted by anton

Make sure no one else is looking, then pull down your pants, stick your ass up to the window, and moon those fools.

#122 | Posted by BENDOR

Holy fuck, you are dumb. That, or you have some of the best selective reading skills of anyone on the DR, and that's saying a whole lot.

Acknowledging that he's a hypocrite, I simply stated that at least he's not been on a rampage for the last 2000 years.
I simply stated that at least he's not been on a rampage for the last 2000 years.
at least he's not been on a rampage for the last 2000 years.
not been on a rampage for the last 2000 years.
rampage for the last 2000 years.
for the last 2000 years.
the last 2000 years.
2000 years.

if you "believe" in man-caused climate change, you're one of his disciples.

It was a comparison of the temporal duration of the "rampage" -- not at all denying that Al Gore is almost as full of shit as you are, Bendor.

#128 | Posted by Zarathustra

I seriously doubt anyone else understood this either.

Al Gore hasn't been on a rampage for the last 2,000 years?

WTF?

I give up. Al Gore is the high priest of man-cause climate change - the new religion. Don't defend him if you don't want to be painted with the same brush.

Make sure no one else is looking, then pull down your pants, stick your ass up to the window, and moon those fools.

#127 | Posted by BENDOR at 2009-05-26 02:12 PM | Reply

If I had read your advice earlier, I might have followed it. However, I suspect these jerks are closeted gays. And, being straight myself, I wouldn't want to be a tease.

These TV pastors and Bernie Madoff have a lot in common. Their followers suffer from IQ deficiency.

Last try, Bendor. Remember, this is a thread about the fundie christians, not Al Gore.

------

How is this different than giving Al Gore your money?

Al gets richer and you feel better about yourself.

And none of that changes anything.

#92 | Posted by BENDOR at 2009-05-25 03:05 PM | Reply | Flag:

Nice attempted deflection.

I think Al Gore is a hypocrite and in the business for selfish reasons, but at least he's not been pillaging the earth for the last two millennia [LIKE CHRISTIANITY.

#93 | Posted by Zarathustra at 2009-05-25 03:10 PM | Reply | Flag:

I put a big hint for you in bold there. Can you spot it? You ought to be able to figure out the context of the rest of my posts from there, but it looks like you're too busy attacking Al Gore (whom I have NEVER defended) to pull your head out of your ass.

Have a nice day!

I put a big hint for you in bold there. Can you spot it? You ought to be able to figure out the context of the rest of my posts from there, but it looks like you're too busy attacking Al Gore (whom I have NEVER defended) to pull your head out of your ass.

Have a nice day!

#132 | Posted by Zarathustra

You're a crack up Zara!

Thanks for the correction and making me laugh...