Jesus H. Cristo. At this rate, the British are going to become even more spineless than the French.

And notice that it is women coming up with such nonsense

As if this was a new thing. Most of the traditional fairy tales found in Grimm and Perreault (there are hundreds beyond "Cinderella" and "Little Red Cap") are not read anymore because the value system that they reflect is not congruous with contemporary values.

When they are being told they have been redacted and edited tremendously. For example, in one of the original versions of "Cinderella" the evil step sisters cut off their heals and toes to get their feet to fit into the glass slipper. They are found out by the evidence of the blood seeping from the slipper. After Cinderella wins her prince, the evil step sisters have their eyes plucked out by crows. One version has them tortured by being force to wear metal shoes which are heated by a fire.

Would you read this version to your four year old daughter?

Let's face it most people's knowledge of fairy tales do not extend beyond Disney flicks.

Cheers

"Would you read this version to your four year old daughter?"

I'm still not over Rock-a-Bye Baby.

Thank God My favourate bedtime story wasn't any of these fairytails.

Larry

And notice that it is women coming up with such nonsense

#2 | Posted by moneywar

All part of the social engineering project they call feminism. I always thought the dwarfs were cool.

Let's face it most people's knowledge of fairy tales do not extend beyond Disney flicks.

True dat.

Disney tends to happy 'em up sommat awful too.

Remember HCA's "Little Mermaid"?

In the movie she gets to marry her prince and be happy in the end.

In the original tale she dies at the end and becomes the foam on the waves of the incoming tide.

Little Red Riding Hood in the original is a cautionary about the onset of menses as symbolised by the red hood and the predatory nature of men as symbolised by the wolf.

Some of the Brotehrs Grimm Tales are very grim indeed.

Even if the classical fairy tales no longer mesh well with contemporarey values Spud suggests that Aesop's Fables still be read as there is a lot of good stuff in there still.

"The Tortoise and the Hare" is still relevant.

"The Fox and the Grapes" which gives the english language the phrase "Sour Grapes" is another good 'un.

And so on and so forth.

Be Well.

Would you read this version to your four year old daughter?

Maybe not, but by the time I was 4 I knew about my mother's great aunts and uncles who were killed in the Holocaust.

Life is rough. Better to learn earlier than later, IMHO.

Then again, I don't have any kids.

I might read that to my four year old. my daughter is 14 months now. might teach her not to lie and not to treat others so nastily.

"In the movie she gets to marry her prince and be happy in the end."

A pitiful tale of self-loathing if ever there was one.

plus, as everyone unconsciously knows, there's only one sex act which a mermaid is capable. I don't know why I mention that, but... oh well.

plus, as everyone unconsciously knows, there's only one sex act which a mermaid is capable. I don't know why I mention that, but... oh well.

C'mon, HC, use your imagination! *grin* They have two hands, a mouth, and presumably a poop chute.

"I'd like to be
Under the sea
In an octopus's garden
In the shade"

G. Harrison

I don't know why I mention that, but... oh well.

*runs to the car to head to Blockbusters to rent the movie*

there's only one sex act which a mermaid is capable

~HC

Fish head Fish head roly poly fish head...

Ever try to go down on a mermaid?

It's practically impossible without tarter sauce.

Be Well.

and presumably a poop chute

It's Disney. No one shits.

C'mon....

In an octopus's garden

I only have one penis. What am I supposed to do with the other 7 gardens?

/kidding

P.S. 'Sup Goatman? Having a good new year?

"Traditional fairytales 'not PC enough'"

That's a Grimm pronouncement.

G. Harrison
#11 | Posted by goatman

I thought that was Ringo. wait, its writing credits you're talking about, nevermind.

Don't fool yourself, Goat, its winkin' at you.

"*runs to the car to head to Blockbusters to rent the movie*"
#12 | Posted by ness_gadol

LOL... google "Little Mermaid Penis Imagery" for fun.

Fish head Fish head roly poly fish head...

Excellent. That needs a video posting.

Don't fool yourself, Goat, its winkin' at you.

LOL. Yes, I get it. Zappa, "Broken Hearts are for Assholes". Good one, HC

Briwo got to meet Bill Mumy for his radio show. Lucky bastard.

~NG

As a confirmed sci-fi geek and a child of the seventies Spud was also deeply envious of Briwo there.

Be Well.

A DR fairy tale;

Once upon a time, the spirit of the dr blogworld, rogers, grew tired of his life of isolated godliness.

'what good is having all this power if i only stay here in the tower', says he.

Everyone knew something was up one day, he came down and actually had something funny to say. and then he kicked 101 out for a day.

Feeling all better and gay, he goes back to his tower, it is no joke, because that's where he keeps his hookers and coke.

Before her death, the poet Anne Sexton rewrote a number of familiar fairytales for adult audiences in her book Transformations. And you thought the Brothers Grimm were grim? B-b-b-baby, you ain't seen nothing yet.

Cinderella

You always read about it:
the plumber with the twelve children
who wins the Irish Sweepstakes.
From toilets to riches.
That story.

Or the nursemaid,
some luscious sweet from Denmark
who captures the oldest son's heart.
from diapers to Dior.
That story.

Or a milkman who serves the wealthy,
eggs, cream, butter, yogurt, milk,
the white truck like an ambulance
who goes into real estate
and makes a pile.
From homogenized to martinis at lunch.

To read the rest of the poem, go here:

Clickable last link:

oooh bookmark-worthy site

Here's my haiku.

Grimm and gory tales
Corrupt children's hearts and minds
Let's watch news instead

a thought,
still liquid hot, lava:
yet all lava builds
about itself a fortress,
every thought crushes
itself at last with "laws"

from : Human, All Too Human by Friedrich Nietzsche

Another DR fairytale:

Once upon a time, some of the natives, feeling oppressed by King Yellow Dog's PC rules, grew restless, and like all restless natives, they threw a pissy fit.

From his lofty blog castle, high up in the internet hills, King Yellow Dog said, "If you don't like it here, start your own damn kingdom and run it as you see fit. See how you like it when someone shits on your royal red carpets."

And so they did. King Rex, Rex Rex to his subjects, ruled over the roudy kingdom known to friends and foes alike as PWZ. Happy kingdoms are all alike; every unhappy kingdom is unhappy in its own way. Soon the moat went up and banishments occurred left and right, but mostly on the left.

Much of what transpired is unknown to those outside the moat. A few insiders know, but they aren't talking lest they have their tongues cut out by Rex Rex, who eventually evicted himself from his own kingdom and came sauntering back to King Yellow Dog, pleading for re-admittance to the DR kingdom. Being a tolerant sovereign, or a lackadaisical one, depending on your source, King Yellow Dog, who really wanted to be the Pope when he grew up, threw caution to the wind and said, "WTF? It's only bandwidth."

And that is how King Rex came to be known as DR's weekend bartender and resident muzak bad boy. That story. Just don't tell the children. It would be much too scary, politically incorrect and emotionally damaging to their budding psyches.

Grimm and gory tales
Corrupt children's hearts and minds
Let's watch news instead

I like it.

"It is difficult
to get the news from poems
yet men die miserably every day
for lack
of what is found there.
Hear me out
for I too am concerned
and every man
who wants to die at peace in his bed
besides."

William Carlos Williams

"WTF? It's only bandwidth."

#26 | Posted by Gal_Tuesday

Extremely insiteful, funi & thanks for the herstory lesson, Gal!

Sounds biblical.

ps does Tuesday Lobsang Rampa have anything to with your handle name (or is it a Tuesday Weld connection? Or?:>)

ps does Tuesday Lobsang Rampa have anything to with your handle name (or is it a Tuesday Weld connection? Or?:>)

Nothing so exotic, I'm afraid. More like an allergic reaction to the thought of being anybody's political Girl Friday.

Actually, I picked the handle because I think of Weds. as being the middle of the week and of myself as being a little left of center.

Actually, I picked the handle because I think of Weds. as being the middle of the week and of myself as being a little left of center.

That naming convention wouldn't work for a few here like e.g. deth, hans, redneckshill because there are no days before Sunday.

I'm goin' for 'titinus' next time I get my 'boyd' moment ~ if ever:>)

"In the movie she gets to marry her prince and be happy in the end."

A pitiful tale of self-loathing if ever there was one.

plus, as everyone unconsciously knows, there's only one sex act which a mermaid is capable. I don't know why I mention that, but... oh well.

#10 | Posted by Hagbard_Celine at 2009-01-05 10:37 PM | Reply | Flag:

By that point in the movie (and the original story) she has legs and (presumably) all the fun bits that go along with.

But don't let what actually happened in the movie stop you from ridiculing things that didn't happen in it.

Now I lay me down to sleep,
I pray the Lord my soul to keep;
Should I die before I wake,
I pray the Lord my soul to take.

Why do the builders who build basement stairs
Put spaces between every step?
Aren't they even the Tim-tiny, least bit aware
How a monster-free basement is kept?

Could that pool table nobody's fooled with in years
Be an alien-probing ER?
Or that hu-midifier you picked up at Sears
A shape-shifting demonical Tsar?

As even the littlest, scared-y kids tell
The odds of a monster-made lair
Increase by a factor of stupid contractor-built
Openings between the stairs.

A highly trained monster will sit there and wait
The good ones aren't easily rankled.
And just when your shivering goosebumps abate
He'll reach out and grab your left ankle.

That's all that he'll do, un-
less he's a blue one,
In which case he'll feed on your marrow.

So here is a prayer
To repeat on the stairs
and make trips to the cellar less harrowed:

Lord let me walk in your footprints
May your goodness and grace be my ferry
And if there are monsters with blue tints
I have nothing against being carried

But don't let what actually happened in the movie stop you from ridiculing things that didn't happen in it.
#32 | Posted by soheifox

Are you kidding? How does the fact that she became a human change the fact of her self-loathing?

And for goodness sake, my comment about the "sex act" was a direct quote from a book that I expected at least a few retorters were familiar with.

"In the movie she gets to marry her prince and be happy in the end."

A pitiful tale of self-loathing if ever there was one.

plus, as everyone unconsciously knows, there's only one sex act which a mermaid is capable. I don't know why I mention that, but... oh well

If there is "self-loathing" on the part of Ariel in the Disney film it is because of what being a mermaid represents to the character. It is not meant to represent her being; rather is a handy metaphor for childhood itself. The break between the world of the land with its promise of male female relationships and the world of the sea where it is safe under Daddy's protection is the break between the world of adulthood and childhood itself. Ariel loathes it the way any child loathes their own status as a child and wishes for adulthood.

You allude to a mermaid sexual behavior. This is actually no small part of the film. Getting her legs to walk on land are part of what is necessary for her to land (pun intended) a man. Getting legs are first of all a physical change in the body to show maturity--the way getting breasts or a period represent such physical changes to young girls/women. Moreover, having legs means that she does, indeed, have the sexual anatomy of a woman and can enter into a sexual relationship with a man.

The issue that her father has with Ariel is actually a bit trite in (Triton! get it?) the sense that it is about a father's uncomfortableness with his daughter growing up to become a woman--a sexual being if you will. Usually a mother mediates these problems between daughter and father, but as usual for Disney films, there is an absent parent. Sebastian the crab takes on the role of mother in this regard.

The sexual politics of the movie are clearly illustrated in the comparison of Triton with his phallic trident and phallic turreted castle, with Ursula, the rather rubenesque sea witch who dwells in some kind of purple, vaginal cave and who longs to possess Triton's trident.

Ursula, of course, upon gaining that power-the trident- becomes engorged and huge, taking on a male voice and, like all evil female characters in a patriarchal society, is unable to control male power for constructive purposes. (This is the nature of evil women in patriarchal societies. Desiring male power is corrupting. Getting it is evil.)

Her usurping of male power is finally challenged and overcome by the person who will replace King Triton in Arial's life--Eric. In the final scene Eric aboard a clipper ship penetrates the underbelly of the bloated Ursula with the phallic prow of the ship thereby asserting male power and diminishing Ursula's co-opting of that power--ultimately killing her in the process. Patriarchy triumphs!

Eventually, of course, Ariel trades one male figure for another as she is given to Eric in marriage by Triton.

When my kids were little they watched the movie a thousand times, I couldn't help but analyze it to relieve myself of the tedium.

Cheers

Well put, Grendel.

Thanks Hagbard,

If anyone is interested in a bit of evidence to support my claims of the sexual subtext of the Little Mermaid check out the following clip from the movie.

"In particular pause at the 37/38 second mark."

Nice Vagina.

When my kids were little they watched the movie a thousand times, I couldn't help but analyze it to relieve myself of the tedium.
Cheers
#37 | Posted by Grendel

Nice analogy Grendel! Do you know if all the Disney movies have that type of analysis behind them? I ask because I have a two year old that will soon be watching them over and over and over and...well, you get the point. It would be nice to have an adult thought every now and again suring movie time.

Quick..better all gather for a good olde fashioned book burnin . I always enjoyed the tales of the brothers Grimm..even as a child on my bookshelf was a copy of how they were originally written...and grim they were indeed. These pc pant pissers need to get a life..there is more un-pc schitt happening on prime time tv every night..not to mention the news!

I wish Arnold Schwarzenegger would do a books on tape with him reading Grimm's Fairy Tales.

How do you get children to understand not to wander away or go with strangers without telling them something that's a little frightening?

I wish Arnold Schwarzenegger would do a books on tape with him reading Grimm's Fairy Tales.

Start with the "Three Little Pigs". When I tell people how the pigs were swallowed whole by the wolf, they look at me with fright. They had never heard of this version.

Nice analogy Grendel! Do you know if all the Disney movies have that type of analysis behind them?

Bartimus,

Starting with Huckleberry Finn, invariably all children's literature --be it film or literary--is about empowering children in a world in which they are powerless.

A child's fantasy it to have autonomy--the control or charge normally only given to adults.

Most literature of this type then depicts the power struggles between the adult world of authority and the children's world of being subjected to that authority.

If the main characters are not children then they are usually some kind of anthropomorphic animal stand in for children. Mice work very well--small creatures that live off in a house and live what is provided by others.

If you go down any list of children's lit, you will begin to see how much this is true:

Wizard of Oz, Harry Potter, Lion King, Lion Witch and the Wardrobe, Wrinkle in Time, Secret Garden, the Hobbit etc. etc.

Often such literature capitalizes on the childhood fantasy of saving the day, the adult world, the town etc. despite the fact that the adult world has marginalized the child's voice or concerns--

In the end, "We tried to tell you Dad, but you wouldn't listen..."

or

"Well we couldn't have done it if weren't for you kids."

The other prevalent motif in children's literature is the orphan--everything from Oliver Twist to Harry Potter to little Orphan Annie. Being an orphan represents a child's greatest fear and greatest fantasy and that is both found in the notion of being completely free/isolated from Mom and Dad.

Beyond that there are specific readings I could give about Harry Potter, the Wizard of Oz, even Rudolph but I think I have said enough. I will leave off with this:

Consider ET, the Extraterrestrial. It is a re telling of the gospel.

ET comes from the heavens, he must be kept from the authorities. He heals people, dresses in a long white robe in one scene, he has a glowing (sacred) heart. He dies and comes back to life. He returns to heaven, says he will come back and he tell us how to act--"Be Good."

Cheers

P.S.

The Lion King is Disney's musical comedy version of Hamlet.

Cheers

#46 | Posted by Grendel
#47 | Posted by Grendel

Thanks Grendel. Looks like I need to pay more attention to the good ol' classics of Disney. Who knew?

what about the news? should children be allowed to listen to the news?