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XXXXX DRUDGE RETORT XXXXX 16:51:18 UTC MON OCT 06 2003 XXXXX Arnold: 'The Republican Party's In My Pants, And You're Invited'! YOUR VOTE IS YOUR VOICE: REMEMBER TO VOTE THIS THURSDAY!
By Rogers Cadenhead With only a few days before the Oct. 9 recall election, Arnold Schwarzenegger continues to swing the biggest poll in California -- in spite of the growing number of offenses he has committed against women, Holocaust survivors and the English language. That's the shocking conclusion reached Monday afternoon by THE CAUCASIAN, the student newspaper of Bob Jones University. "In a poll of 1,400 registered voters, Schwarzenegger leads Lt. Gov. Cruz Bustamante 13 percent to 12," reports THE CAUCASIAN. "State Sen. Tom McClintock is a distant third at 10 percent." In other election news, Schwarzenegger apologized Monday for snatching a young Guatemalan boy named Tico off the streets and forcing him to work as a slave at his residence for the last 17 years. "Tico helps Arnold with his morning bath," said a source close to the actor [but not as close as Tico]. "When you're freakishly muscle-bound, there are some mobility issues that make it tough to clean those hard-to-reach places." "I recognize that I have offended people," Schwarzenegger said in a prepared statement. "And those people that I have offended, I want to say to them I am deeply sorry about that and I apologize." When asked if this meant Tico was free to leave, Schwarzenegger declined comment. SU VOTO ES SU VOZ: RECUERDE VOTAR ESTE MARTES! © DRUDGE RETORT 2003 |